The G-Spot: The mythical pot of gold at the end of a rainbow
I don’t know how many of you caught this piece of horrible news for the ladies in the audience, but scientists have found that there is no evidence of the mythical “G-Spot” in women.
From the Times of London:
A sexual quest that has for years baffled millions of women – and men – may have been in vain. A study by British scientists has found that the mysterious G-spot, the sexual pleasure zone said to be possessed by some women but denied to others, may not exist at all.
For an analysis with more depth:
“Women may argue that having a G-spot is due to diet or exercise, but in fact it is virtually impossible to find real traits,” said Tim Spector, professor of genetic epidemiology, who co-authored the research. “This is by far the biggest study ever carried out and it shows fairly conclusively that the idea of a G-spot is subjective.”
Well… I guess that sucks. How many man hours have been wasted in the bedrooms of America trying to find the product of some woman’s flight of fancy about her super-heroine, realistic-karate-chop-like-action orgasmic abilities? How many times have men been blamed for failing to satisfy their woman when it isn’t their fault, but basic human physiology’s?
An even better question: How about you ladies just be quiet about unfullfilling sex lives and go get us a beer? The game is on.
(That was a horrible joke. I’m sorry.)
Cheer up ladies. Your salvation is delivered in the article’s last paragraph.
Meanwhile, David Matlock, a Beverly Hills cosmetic surgeon, is credited with creating an artificial version of the G-spot. In some cases this has resulted in an over-sensitive zone which induces orgasms when, for example, women drive over bumps in the road.
[emphasis is mine — MM]
I don’t know whether to be jealous, or slightly frightened at the thought of women drivers being even more distracted…
(Oooo… Another bad joke… Take it with a grain of salt ladies, you know we men love you. Increasing populations the world over prove that the “war between the sexes” is also a myth. We’re getting along famously.)
Latest posts by Mike McGowan (Posts)
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- Romney v. Newt: How the GOP and the conservative media killed the TEA Party - January 31, 2012
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We will still blame men for failing to satisfy us… if not for our man’s inability to find our “mythical” g-spot then we will find something else he has done that only left us wanting more…
An interesting topic coming one whose last encounter with a vagina was the day of his birth.
Yeah, you are an abusive troll, no doubt.
Must not have checked the bio, huh?
YOUR FACE WOULD EXPLAIN WHY WOMEN NEVER HAVE ORGASMS AROUND YOU. YOU HAVE A FACE FOR BLOG POSTINGS. NEVER POST ABOUT SEX AGAIN PLEASE. IT IS OBVIOUS TO ALL THAT YOU HAVE NEVER HAD ANY.
lol
I at least have the gonads to associate my picture and name with my opinions and wiritng. Nice one, internet tough guy.
* writing
ROFL YORE A TUFF RITER BECAUSE YOU INCLUDED PICSHURE GOOD GOING BUDDY
So tell me, how do you turn women on?
Because, for the life of me, I can’t see how “I’m a coward who tries to flame people on the internet but I just wind up looking like a jackass because I’m not funny and I can’t spell.” works as a pickup line.
Mike,
Right on. Why should men even consider wasting their time worrying about whether their partner is getting pleasure.
So… you *have* had access to women, but you’re a single father now. What happened? Was it your abrasive, “lol so un-pc” insulting attitude toward women that drove her away?
Abusive troll wins the thread.
Hehe, really enjoyed that comment.
Ok, it’s obvious some people don’t understand that this was written as a humor piece. I guess the word “joke” is too obscure a word in the English language for some posters…
Maybe we should apply some minimum intelligence standards to internet use?
As to the questions about my personal life: Why do you care? The topic at hand is the study by the British scientists showing that the G-Spot doesn’t exist.
I JUST FIND IT FUNNY THAT YOU SAY “How many times have men been blamed for failing to satisfy their woman when it isn’t their fault..?” (THATS HOW QUOTATION MARKS ARE REALLY USED FYI)
LOL
WHAT ELSE CAN I SAY? IT REALLY HAS NOT BEEN A PROBLEM IN MY EXPERIENCE. ‘MAN HOURS’ LOL MORE LIKE MAN MINUTES FOR ME BUDDY ROFL WHAT A TOOL CANT EVEN GET A WOMAN OFF BY LIKES TO BRAG ABOUT HIS GONADS. WHATS THE POINT OF HAVING GONADS IF YOU CANT USE THEM PROPERLY. MAYBE THERE SHOULD BE A FUGLINESS TEST FOR RETAINING YOUR BALLS.
Quotation marks are used properly by putting too many periods in a sentence, followed by a question mark, surrounded by quotation marks?
You know, if you push the “Caps Lock” button one more time you can get the letters to appear in lower case? FYI.
Blah, I though it might be entertaining destroying this troll, but I find battles of wits with the unarmed less than exciting. Back to some really boring playoff football on Wild Card Weekend.
Mike writes:
“Ok, it’s obvious some people don’t understand that this was written as a humor piece. I guess the word “joke” is too obscure a word in the English language for some posters…
Maybe we should apply some minimum intelligence standards to internet use?”
…Or maybe we should apply some minimum funniness standards to the use of the term “humor piece.”
DW 500, do you think the vitriol aimed at Mike by commenters is because they don’t think the piece is funny enough? Really? Funny to you or not, the post is clearly light-hearted, a bit of silliness about a recent study in the news. Commenters seem to be taking this seriously, acting like Mike did something really bad, like make some racially insensitive remarks about the president or something. What exactly are the commenters so angry about here?
Quite possibly we just don’t find degrading sexual attitudes toward women funny? Personally, I think if a man has to make insult jokes about women, he’s got some issues. You can’t make the insulting funny, even if you say “That was a horrible joke, I’m sorry.”
Or, perhaps, I’m just having fun at big ol’ fat bald single Mikey’s expense because it’s fun. It’s just a joke, you know, what are you so angry about? Geez, you must have some agenda up your sleeve if you’re angry about a little joke. The real topic here is that some scientists have found the G-spot inconclusive. And I wasted all those hours with chicks! Fuckin’ bitches! Get me a beer.
Can’t we all just get along?
@ Wonderin’
“You can’t make the insulting funny, even if you say “That was a horrible joke, I’m sorry.”
Of course you can. Larry the Cable Guy has used that as a running gag in his act for years.
He even goes so far as to pray to God for forgiveness after his joke, and asks him to bless the little Pygmies in Africa. Amen.
Forget the g-spot, Mr. McGowan probably can’t find the glans clitorus, either. Or a woman. My sources at Sadly are usually correct.
This scintillating discourse on the male-female dynamic as it pertains to sex and the societal roles contained therein has left me comtemplative and reflective. I shall return to my parlor for a bourbon and a copy of ‘Lady Chatterley’s Lover” , with Coltrane in the background, of course to complete the milieu.
And you’re a wanker. Also
I doubt Mike would disagree if I said he is not a professional comedian (since he isn’t one), so I assume he won’t take offense when I say that I am not remotely comparing him to the following shows, movies, and people, who most definitely insulted the hell out of a lot of people and were often pretty funny doing it, or were thought to be funny by lots of people (humor being subjective, of course):
Chris Rock (we could easily find degrading of women in his act if that’s what we’re looking for); George Carlin; Don Rickles (his whole act is insult); South Park (they have probably managed to insult everyone by now); Tropic Thunder (I addressed that here); The Daily Show (mockery is what it does — insulting to those being mocked, I assume); The Simpsons…. the list goes on and on, particularly if you’re sensitive.
Can we agree to reject Wonderin’s statement, “You can’t make the insulting funny,” even if you don’t find Mike’s post funny and even if you are ideologically opposed to what some of our writers post on this site?
(And if you think you’ve found a right-wing site, you’re only partly correct. I invite you to give us a real tour, maybe starting with our contributors, some of whom are conservative or libertarian but some of whom are not.
Yo just wanna jump in and say, by your logic, telling women to bring you beer (like a slave, TEE HEE) is hilarious insult comedy.
Nice to see conservatives are still trying to use the old “we make disparaging remarks about everyone who isn’t like us, but it’s ok, cuz its all a big joke.” See Ann Coulter. It’s not funny, it’s lame. Rhetoric is actually important. Go to college.
Great news! Now if only they could prove that this damn “clitterus” thing that my girlfriend is always buggin me about don’t really exist, either, then sex might become halfway fun for guys like me.
Also, can someone do a sientific study that says that women who want foreplay before sex are fridgid bitches, and another one proving that cuddling after sex is linked to breast cancer? I’d sure appreciate that.
you are fat & bald & don’t know how to satisfy a woman
@ brovis
Fat? Maybe. Depends on the person.
Bald? Yeah, I shave my head.
Don’t know how to satisfy a woman? Of course I do. I watch TV. I’ve seen the commercials. I just don’t like shopping at Jared’s.
Come on. I got the joke and I am a very politically correct liberal. Probably as liberal as they come.
Save the irritation for the real misogyny. There is plenty out there.
I have to say this though, I am pretty sure the author of this post never heard of a G-Spot until he learned that it might not exist. He probably thought it was some weird thing from the 70s like poppers and ben-wa balls.
@Mike,
Larry the Cable Guy is not funny to anyone whose IQ is above that of a spyrochete, so using his brand of raicst/sexist/homophobic southern pandering as an example helps your case in no way.
That, and your intimation that women are magpies to be bought with diamonds from Jareds just paints you as a sad, sorry, loveless, bitter little man who can only save his fragile ego by painting all the women who reject him as materialistic manipulating shrews.
Heyo! Just a joke folks! Ahyuck! Giterdone!
@ Wonderin’
That would be Jared’s not-so-subtle message, as you can clearly tell by viewing their commercials. You know the ones, the two women are sitting at the table, one of the women pulls out a ring with a small planetary object afixed to it, and both begins dancing, cheering, hugging, kissing… Get the picture?
Maybe you should make it your mission to go stand outside each Jare’ds store and protest? Take some signs, maybe a bullhorn, a few handfuls of granola, you know, make a day of it? After all, they’re making the suggestion that the only way a man can really make his woman happy is to give her one of their rings, and they’re doing it for profit, while I was engaging in some harmless joking for nothing but a couple of dry chuckles.
Get your panties out of a bunch, or get busy going after the people who really matter, like Jared’s. :-)
AND YOU SEEM TO BUYING THAT SUGGESTION, WHAT A TOOL
I WILL NOW ENGAGE IN SOME HARMLESS JOKING
WHAT MIKE REALLY WONDERS IS WHETHER THERE IS SUCH A THING A G SPOT ON A GOAT, AND IF IT IS LOCATED IN THE ANUS
HIS CURRENT RESEARCH HAS PROVEN UNSATISFACTORY (FOR THE GOAT AT LEAST)
lol
Typical knee-jerk ideologue.
Doesn’t the idea that I’m aware of the ad’s message lend weight to the idea that I don’t buy it?
And liberals say they’re the only ones with a sense of humor. Jesus, y’all wouldn’t recognize sarcasm if it walked up and slapped you in the face, now would ya?
Have you read anything else I’ve written on this site?
IT IS THOROUGHLY AMUSING TO ME THAT THERE IS A REPEATED SUGGESTION THAT LIBERALS JUST DONT GET YOUR HUMOR
YOU ARE JUST TOO RACY FOR THE LIBERAL MIND WITH YOUR SHOCKING IRONIC SEXISM YES YES BUDDY
BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT, LIKE YOUR WORK IN THE BEDROOM, YOU ARE JUST NOT VERY GOOD AT THIS
CONTINUE TO CAMP YOUR OWN COMMENT SECTION CAPTAIN UGLYFACE
@Scott Stein,
That’s adorable, your little defense of Mike and your “openminded, really, not just knee jerk right wingtard” site. Soooo cute!
The difference between insult ‘comedy’ and criticism comedy is in the purpose, and in the evenhandedness.
@ Youlika
You seem to be here as much as I am. Since we’ve decided to pitch tents right next to one another, maybe we should build a fire and sing Kum-ba-Ya?
Try reading anything else I’ve written?
Sorry kids, I haven’t seen these Jared ads you refer to. I don’t watch TV.
Accepting their apparent degrading viewpoint as women in order to insult women yourself makes it seem like you agree with them. Otherwise you’d be criticisng Jared’s viewpoint of women rather than agreeing with them.
Larry the Cable Guy is funny?
Ha ha ha LIBERALS and the smelly WOODSTOCK generation and your liberal LIES trying to make me MIKE CAVEGUY FEEL BAD because my cave lady doesn’t go OOOO OOOO every time I slip her a bit of my CAVE-DICK. Just another way that liberals and their GASHES keep destroying the very fabric of WESTERN SOCIETY.
Hang in there Mike, and keep fighting the good fight. I, for one, completely “got” your joke…too bad the prissy little liberal fembots don’t have the nutsacks to grasp ’em firmly in hand.
Right, Kathy, insulting women is the good fight.
Get back in the kitchen and get me a beer.
Just a joke, giterdun!
Better to be a liberal fembot than a right wing frigidaire, Kathy.
LOL POOR LONELY MIKE
Lay off, Lesley. Prefeminist women are hot, because THEY LOVE TEH CAVEDICK lol props to youlika
Mike,
I consider myself to be an intelligent woman and a bit of a feminist, and I laughed out loud at this post. Very funny. Sorry people are such jerks.
Hahahaha, “Get me a beer!”
Hahahahaha, I can’t stop laughing at that totally original, clever and entirely fresh piece of humor!
Wait.
Seriously, even if you want to sell this article as comedy, you are at least fifty or sixty years too late for that to be considered funny. The whole, “You are a woman, service me!” brand of humor stopped being funny around high school or college – you know, around the time that you realized women had feelings and were human beings? And you got over your bitterness and frustration with them?
You know…ten or fifteen years ago?
When you were 19?
I think we’ve all gone through a phase where we were angry at the opposite sex – but most of us grew out of it and realized that these weren’t jokes – they were remnants of a dead culture. Telling a woman to go get you a beer and calling it a joke is pretty much the same as suggesting your Irish friend build you an iconic bridge, your black friend pick you some cotton, or your Jewish friend…well…I won’t even go there to make a point.
Point being, I guess it’s funny – if you never outgrew the natural male misogyny that we all have to overcome when we are teenagers, or in our early 20’s.
Also, the whole idea that, because people are having babies, the war of the sexes is over, is just plain stupid. It demonstrates that you know absolutely nothing about gender relations – think about it: the two countries with the largest populations, and still growing, are two of the countries who treat women the worst. India, a billion people, and, yes, many women are still forced into marriages where they know they could be killed at any moment.
War of the sexes is over, because some women are forced into dangerous and abusive marital situations! Hahaha, what a funny joke! Except, wait: it’s not.
Look, I say sexist stuff all the time (I figure, if a woman can make money for being pretty, what is this glass ceiling we speak of?), so I understand where you’re coming from. But as someone pointed out, criticism and insult are different, and people like Jon Stewart mock and criticize mainly by juxtaposing people’s words with their actions.
Suggesting that your “humor” piece is funny because it is pointing out a truth, then…the implications are really heavy. Because you’re not pointing out the truth. You’re merely demonstrating that women won’t have sex with you and you are still very, very bitter over it.
Oh, and being bitter over the inability to satisfy a woman isn’t a sign that you don’t get laid – it’s a sign that you get laid plenty – you just weep afterward.
And, you suggested we read your profile to get a better understanding of you? Ha. Single father.
Yeah, no bitterness towards your ex there. None at all. “Get me a beer.” Precious. You’re like a middle schooler.
@ Chester: wow – you should see your doc about that PMS, its giving you anger issues!
Sometimes, anger is the appropriate response.
I’m sorry, but when I read blatantly sexist crap on the internet that someone wants to sell as humor, I think there is some small responsibility – perhaps to morality, or perhaps to society as a whole – to speak up and say, “Hey. That’s inappropriate.”
Forgive me – I’m extremely conservative that way. Men have an obligation to look out for women – not insult them and treat them like servants. I won’t apologize for my conservative morality. This isn’t an “anger issue.” This is the right and proper way for society to deal with idiots – call them out.
@ Chester –
But what about when it is clearly sarcastic? You can rationally argue that if someone were to truly believe the words above that it would be wrong. But what if the comments are clearly made sarcastically. Yes you could say that the speaker/writer is sexist in thinking that’s funny but someone could easily take your comment that “Men have an obligation to look out for women” as just as sexist.
I think in the end, the tongue in cheek manner in which it is written is enough to make the outrage warrantless. Indifference, even mild disdain…perhaps…but outrage and sanctimonious anger seems…I don’t know…a bit like an over-reaction.
LOL! This is hilarious! The article is funny, but the commentary is even better! It surprises me that people would have that type of overreaction to an article that is an opinion/response to another funny article….its not like this was on your nightly news or in the newspaper! You have to admit the elusive G-Spot makes you giggle!
As a “feminist” I actually take more offense to the comments referring to men having an obligation to look out for women. That comment says to me, that you feel that as a woman I am too weak, fragile, and incapable of defending myself against other men, rude comments that might damage my feminine feelings, or whatever else might come my way. That is insulting, still promoting inequality, and thus making women servants because they must be “looked after.” Where would be the easiest place for you to look after women….under your thumb perhaps?
@Chester…if you want middle school behavior go take a look at @youlikathemens who finds an appropriate response to a frivolous article to shout and name call.
The fact that Mike has custody as a single dad tells me a lot about him as a father and a person, considering in most custody cases mothers still get preference. So Ha indeed!
As a therapist I have found that there is large percentage of the population that never evolves past our middle school developmental stage. For as noble as your call for extreme PC-Ness may be…you need to a bit more realistic since you live in this society. Lighten up, have a laugh, try to find the G-Spot, it will do you some good considering all of the other nightmarish things that happen in the world. If that doesn’t work, there is a spot open for you in my anger management group…you can carpool with @youlikathemens.
Mike- I’m glad to see that after all these years, you’re still willing to put something out there for debate! For as many people that I see that are trying so hard to be something they are not to “fit” into others peoples view of how we should be, I’m glad that you are still being true to who you are! We didn’t always agree back in the day, probably don’t now, but I definitely appreciated the debates!