Top ten signs your kid hated summer camp

Top ten signs your kid hated summer camp

Posted on September 7th, 2009 by Bob Sullivan

10. The camp motto was: Parents must pay up front.

9. His archery instructor’s hero was William Tell.

8. “Movie Night” consisted of slides of the owner’s vacation in Detroit.

7. The cook’s dishes all began with the word ‘Blackened’ — and he isn’t Cajun.

6. Lacking proper wood, during Arts & Crafts the kids were encouraged to whittle on each other.

5. For some reason, instead of campfire songs, the only songs the counselors knew were show tunes.

4. He sent you a note that he was making a break for it, and to meet him at the north gate at midnight.

3. His cabin mate’s favorite pastime: Tying him to the bedpost and covering him with honey.

2. Inspired by Slumdog Millionaire, every other night the counselors drove the kids into town and made them beg for money.

1. Recreational activities included waterboarding.

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

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Bob Sullivan

Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.