Top ten things you don’t want to hear from your college roommate
10. “When my last roommate gave me any trouble, I just beat him with a sockful of nickels.”
9. “What’s the point of having two beds in this room?”
8. “I’m studying the flesh-eating virus, so all these drawers here are off limits.”
7. “Hope you don’t mind all the Justin Bieber posters.”
6. “Oh, Glenn Beck is like God to me!”
5. “So which are you, Team Edward or Team Jacob?”
4. “Hi, I’m Steven, but on the weekends I’m Stephanie.”
3. “Seriously, some of Al-Qaeda’s principles aren’t as crazy as they sound.”
2. “I haven’t stopped crying since I found out the Cathy comic strip was ending.”
1. “Goodnight snuggle?”
Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.
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