Top ten lifeguard pick-up lines
Posted on July 12th, 2010 by Bob Sullivan
10. You’re also supposed to wait half an hour after making love.
9. We could be just like that scene out there: buoy meets gull!
8. Okay if I rub this suntan lotion places the sun doesn’t reach?
7. That white stuff on my nose isn’t sunscreen.
6. How would you like to be Hasselhoffed?
5. I’ll show you a pool toy you can play with.
4. Wow! Your body can be used as a flotation device!
3. Help! I’m drowning!…In your eyes!
2. My high chair or yours?
1. Okay if I practice my mouth-to-mouth?
Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.
Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.
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