Top ten answers to the question “How hot is it?”
10. “It’s so hot, Siri suggested I drop my cell phone in a glass of iced tea.”
9. “It’s so hot, my water buffalo evaporated.”
8. “It’s so hot, Jehovah’s Witnesses have decided to give telemarketing a try.”
7. “It’s so hot, the Campbell Soup Company is changing its directions to ‘Open, pour, and enjoy!’”
6. “It’s so hot, a Republican actually broke down and admitted Global Warming is real.”
5. “It’s so hot, instead of bread, stores are only selling toast.”
4. “It’s so hot, Hillary Clinton will continue campaigning in her pantsuit…without the pants.”
3. “It’s so hot, in Colorado, Washington, Alaska and Oregon, joints are lighting themselves.”
2. “It’s so hot, I ran into a burning building, just to cool off.”
1. “It’s so hot, Melania Trump actually appreciated the cool reception her plagiarized speech got.”
Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.
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