Top ten work one-liners
10. I suppose, when asked by a potential employer if I have a criminal record, “Highest number of robberies in an hour” isn’t an appropriate answer.
9. I don’t mind going to work, but it’s the eight hours waiting to go home that annoy me.
8. My boss just put me in charge of obeying him.
7. I wish some of my co-workers weren’t allowed in the break room, because that’s usually who I need a break from.
6. We will continue having meetings every day until I find out why no work is getting done.
5. At work I was running around like a madman: naked, with a chainsaw.
4. Why would I work through lunch, when I don’t even work through work?
3. My boss needs to stop holding secret meetings about my paranoia.
2. Why does my work week always go: MONDAY–TUESDAY–WEDNESDAY–THURSDAY–blink–MONDAY–TUESDAY–WEDNESDAY–THURSDAY–blink?
1. I’ve been sacked from my job, or as I prefer to think of it, I’m on eternity leave.
Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.
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