10. “Do you want to see the upstairs bathroom, or do you just want to save it all ’til you shit on the Constitution?”

9. “I made history by being the first Black President. And you’ll make history by being the first orange one.”

8. “Once you’re President, how long do you think it’ll be before I get stopped and frisked?”

7. “When it comes to honesty, I know your reputation. And just to let you know, I’ve counted the silverware.”

6. “I’m gonna introduce you to Michelle now, but if you grab anything, you’re comin’ away with a bloody stump.”

5. “If you ever have any questions any time day or night, I’m just a phone call away. And my number is ‘Five-five-five…’”

4. “So I guess you’re going to take the two-word phrase ‘White House’ and stick the word ‘Supremacist’ in the middle.”

3. “I’ll tell you all the secrets about Area 51 if you’ll tell me the secret about what that thing is on your head.”

2. “So Orange really is the new Black!”

1. “It must give you great pleasure to be doin’ your favorite thing in the world: evicting a Black family from their home!”
 

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

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Bob Sullivan

Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.

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