Top ten more Donald Trump jokes of the moment

Top ten more Donald Trump jokes of the moment

Posted on November 7th, 2016 by Bob Sullivan

10. “Donald Trump at a rally this weekend said Hillary Clinton was exhausted and weak after the debates. Yeah, probably because you kept sniffing all the oxygen out of the room.” – Seth Meyers, 10/24/16

9. “Trump’s sniffing was caused by air being sucked into the vacuum behind his eyes.”

8. “Many news outlets are saying Donald Trump will almost certainly pivot to media and launch his own t.v. network after the election. Which means as early as next year we could see Trump TV filing for bankruptcy.” – Seth Meyers, 10/24/16

7. “Could you imagine Trump being on your TV 24 hours a day? That would be like — well, it would be like right now.” – James Corden, 10/17/16

6. “I can’t imagine why people are less excited about voting for Trump, but I guess it could have something to do with insulting women, insulting minorities, bragging about sexual assault, making fun of disabled people, making fun of military veterans, making fun of NFL players who get concussions, antagonizing fellow Republican, not releasing his taxes, not having any real political platform, banning journalists, re-tweeting white supremacists, and having hair that looks like a poorly constructed scarecrow. Other than that, I’ve no idea where he lost people.” – James Corden, 10/24/16

5. “As you know, Trump is being accused of sexual misconduct by a slew of women. Of course, that is a case of ‘he said’ and ‘she said, she said, she said, she said, she said.’” – Jimmy Kimmel, 10/17/16

4. “Donald Trump tweeted that the ‘election is absolutely rigged by the dishonest and distorted media pushing Crooked Hillary — but also at many polling places. Sad!’ Yes, even at polling places, the election is being rigged against Trump. I heard that on November 8th, millions of ‘riggers’ will be behind curtains in private booths, and with a secret ballot, collude to defeat Trump.” – Stephen Colbert, 10/17/16

3. “Trump has tweeted multiple times about the media rigging the election, and he’s right. From day one, the media rigged this election — in favor of Donald Trump. You can’t turn on the TV without seeing Trump. He’s like the Geico gecko, but more cartoonish.” – Stephen Colbert, 10/17/16

2. “Trump’s campaign manager, Kellyanne Conway, said this morning that Republicans should decide whether or not they support Donald Trump and ‘stop pussyfooting around.’ That’s the worst choice of words since Abraham Lincoln said, ‘I need slavery like I need a hole in the head.’” – Seth Meyers, 10/12/16

1. “Donald Trump’s campaign manager, Kellyanne Conway, appeared on Trump’s new Facebook Live show and said Trump ‘unequivocally’ will win the election. So, look out, CNN! There’s a NEW often-wrong news channel in town!” – Seth Meyers, 10/24/16

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

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Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.