Top ten ways to spend your extra hour this coming weekend
Posted on October 26th, 2015 by Bob Sullivan
10. Listen to Frédéric Chopin’s “Minute Waltz” 60 times
9. Alphabetize the names of all of Bill Cosby’s victims
8. Watch “The Best of 2 Broke Girls” 120 times
7. Squeeze out and set aside one-inch lengths of toothpaste to save time in the coming weeks
6. Shampoo, rinse, repeat; Shampoo, rinse, repeat; Shampoo, rinse, repeat…
5. Try, again and again, to reset the clock on your VCR
4. Listen to “American Pie” and “Alice’s Restaurant” twice each
3. Share a bottle of Irish whiskey, then see who can say the phrase “Irish wristwatch” the most times in one hour
2. Make love to the wife, then take a nap for the other 55 minutes
1. Put on your Mr. Peabody mask and pretend you’re going back in time
Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.
Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.
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