Top ten things overheard by Russian microphones at Sochi
10. “That’s the gayest opening ceremony I’ve ever seen!”
9. “I guess they’ll be taking Shaun White’s picture off all those gum packages now.”
8. “Man, the drinking water’s the same color, whether it’s going in or out of my body.”
7. “That woman curler gives great broom!”
6. “I said I’m a ‘biathlete’, not a ‘bi athlete’!”
5. “I haven’t seen this much slush since that explosion at the Icee factory.”
4. “Do you have a door knob on your side?!!”
3. “I just borrowed that guy’s ChapStick, then realized it was Bob Costas.”
2. “Why would President Putin ask me to oil up his bare chest?”
1. “Is that a microphone?”
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