Top ten lifeguard pickup lines
10. “Need a little help with your breaststroke?”
9. “You’re also supposed to wait half an hour after making love.”
8. “Okay if I practice my mouth-to-mouth?”
7. “Want to play with my ‘pool toy’?”
6. “Help! I’m drowning!…In your eyes!”
5. “This isn’t a nude beach, but in your case I’ll make an exception.”
4. “I’m caught in an undertow of love.”
3. “Your body is harder than my plastic CPR dummy.”
2. “The sign says ‘Lifeguard on Duty,” but I wish it said ‘Lifeguard on Cutie’.”
1. “Look out there on the water, it’s just like us: buoy meets gull.”
Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.
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