Top ten indications that the Easter Bunny is losing it

Top ten indications that the Easter Bunny is losing it

Posted on April 18th, 2011 by Bob Sullivan

10. He’s been hiding Easter eggs in his pants

9. He’s been asking people to call him ‘Moammar’

8. He invested all his money in 8-track technology

7. Instead of hopping down the bunny trail, he’s been sashaying

6. He just declared jihad against Santa

5. He believes Newt Gingrich’s claim that Newt’s extramarital affairs stemmed from how passionately he feels about America

4. He claims his favorite television show is “It’s Always Bunny in Philadelphia”

3. He’s been sneaking into bedrooms and leaving eggs under pillows after taking away the teeth

2. All he’ll eat is artificial grass

1. He claims to have tiger’s blood, Adonis DNA, and fire-breathing fists

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

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Bob Sullivan

Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.