Top ten signs you are too old to be out trick-or-treating

Top ten signs you are too old to be out trick-or-treating

Posted on October 26th, 2009 by Bob Sullivan

10. You have to wheel an IV drip bag on a stand along with you.

9. Instead of candy, you ask for prunes.

8. Your “trick” involves taking out your dentures and then biting your own ear.

7. You’ve gone as Larry King, and you don’t need any makeup.

6. You’re the only SpongeBob on the block with a walker.

5. You can suck the chocolate off the Goobers, but you can’t then chew the peanuts.

4. Your grandkids tell you the best houses to hit.

3. Instead of candy corn, you keep hoping for corn pads.

2. When people open the door, instead of saying “Trick or treat,” you look confused, then start singing Christmas carols.

1. You keep seeing someone dressed up as the Grim Reaper – but you’re the only one who can see him.

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

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Bob Sullivan

Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.