Top ten excuses of Jason LeRoy Savage, recently found guilty of having sex with a carwash vacuum cleaner
Posted on May 4th, 2009 by Bob Sullivan
10. Seriously, did you see that vacuum cleaner?!
9. Due to the bad economy, he was out of money for hookers.
8. She made the first move.
7. Just one in a series of girlfriends who sucked the life out of him.
6. He’s only human!
5. It was the anniversary of their first date.
4. Somebody had sudsed it up and it was looking particularly fine!
3. He was trying to make his home vacuum cleaner jealous.
2. It was purely physical; he didn’t want any attachments.
1. His wet vac was on the fritz.
Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.
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“…he didn’t want any attachments.” Perfect.
This is hilarious….
Hey Bob, this top ten list is another fantastic one. #2 is my favorites, I wouldn’t want any attachments after that encounter either, imagine having to wake-up to a bristle head every morning.. You can post this to our site http://www.toptentopten.com/ and link back to your site. We are trying to create a directory for top ten lists where people can find your site. The coolest feature is you can let other people vote on the rankings of your list.