Bob Sullivan's top ten everythingsports

Top ten excuses of Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling

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10. “I’m no racist! My basketball team is well over half black!”

9. “Poor people and middle-class people are racists; billionaires are just eccentric.”

8. “I’m no more racist than my good buddy, Cliven Bundy.”

7. “How can I be a bigot? My girlfriend who taped me is half black.”

6. “In 1983 I asked a potential new coach, ‘What makes you think you can coach these n*ggers?’ In 2009 I was fined $2.73 million for housing discrimination – the largest such payment in U.S. history – claiming that the blacks in my building ‘smelled’ and ‘aren’t clean’. At least I’m consistent!”

5. “I’m was hoping my remarks would make me a front-runner for the 2016 Republican presidential nomination.”

4. “Since when do you get in trouble for doing a Paula Deen impression?”

3. “I once got a Lifetime Achievement Award from the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People! (Oooooo, I love saying ‘colored people’!)”

2. “How can I be a racist when, only last week, the U.S. Supreme Court held that racism in this country is a thing of the past?”

1. “I just believe in calling a spade a spade.”
 

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.
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