10. “I hear Frank Langella used the same makeup for Nixon that he used for Dracula.”

9. “I love Price, but I never much cared for Waterhouse.”

8. “I’m sorry, but those seats are reserved for the two people who actually saw Frost/Nixon.”

7. “Michael Moore? I’m sorry, Mr. Moore, but you’re not allowed to bring any food into the auditorium.”

6. “They gotta be fixed; I mean, Beverly Hills Chihuahua deserved something!”

5. “Did anybody find out why Heath Ledger’s a no-show?”

4. “I’d like to thank the Academy. And for those of you who think it’s an honor just to be nominated: What a bunch of losers!!!!”

3. “Now that Wolverine has hosted the show, can Cyclops and Storm be far behind?”

2. “I love that new ‘anatomically correct’ Oscar; it’s so much easier to carry!”

1. “I hear they’ve already started torturing that kid from Slumdog Millionaire to find out how it won.”

• Author Bio
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Bob Sullivan

Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.

Latest posts by Bob Sullivan (Posts)

• Top ten reasons this will be my last Top Ten List - April 30, 2018
• Top ten more syntax one-liners - April 23, 2018
• Top ten more alcohol one-liners - April 16, 2018
• Top ten more dog one-liners - April 9, 2018
• Top ten revelations in the Stormy Daniels 60 Minutes interview - April 2, 2018

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