Entries Tagged as 'trusted media & news'

terror & wartrusted media & news

‘Mad’ Misha Saakashvili welcomes report stating that Georgia started the South Ossetian war

Breaking news: an EU fact finding mission composed of 30 European ‘military, legal and history experts’ has just confirmed what anybody with eyes and a brain that has not been befogged by years of Cold War propaganda could figure out for themselves — that Georgia started last year’s war in South Ossetia. Other astonishing evidence the crack team of investigators has uncovered is that Russia then took advantage of the situation to wreak merry havoc inside Georgia, and that many individuals were displaced from their homes in South Ossetia, although apparently they’re not sure exactly who did that. Next week the EU will reveal that cheese does not necessarily have holes in it and that Michael Jackson is dead.

[Read more →]

musictrusted media & news

Extraordinary popular delusions and the madness of the Beatles cult

Last week I had the misfortune to read a true journalistic atrocity. Here are but two paragraphs, awful enough to make a baby die were you to read this tripe within earshot of the aforementioned innocent: [Read more →]

politics & governmenttrusted media & news

Deconstructing ACORN

There was surely no more entertaining story in the news this week than BigGovernment.com’s takedown of ACORN. From start to finish it was a masterclass in absurdity, as the prep school types who did the guerilla filming led a series of bumbling ACORN employees to come up with ever more inventive ways of helping them organize a child prostitution ring. I single out ACORN ‘chief organiser’ Bertha Lewis for special praise however [Read more →]

politics & governmenttrusted media & news

Who is this ‘Jimmy Carter’?

So last night I was watching Anderson Cooper when he announced some breaking news. An old man named Jimmy Carter had implied on NBC that some Republican who called President Obama a liar was a racist. Apparently Carter knew this because he lived in the South, and there was a lot of racism in the South, even today. And, presumably, as this Republican is from the South, then there was probably a hint of racism in what he said. But that’s not all — according to Carter there is also a lot of racism in the criticism of Obama we hear in general. Because Obama’s black and Carter comes from the South, and there’s a lot of racism in the South — or something like that.

[Read more →]

technologytrusted media & news

Stone age memes: RIP Wikipedia

Not everyone noticed it, but the world ended last week. The Wikipedia model tanked. The New York Times reported that the English-language version of the “free encyclopedia that anyone can edit” would will soon institute the editorial review of articles about living people. So there will still be a Wikipedia but the revolutionary encyclopedia we have now will, in effect, cease to exist.

The changes Wikipedia is undergoing are likely to have broad-scale effects on the Internet and on information use throughout cyberspace. [Read more →]

family & parentingtrusted media & news

When did dating become so dangerous?

Earlier this year, when the pop signer Rihanna, was beaten, allegedly by her 19 year old boyfriend, the subject of teenage dating abuse was discussed in the mainstream media, perhaps for the first time.  As brutal and shocking as the attack on the singer was, what horrified me even more was the reaction that young people — particularly girls — in this country had towards it. [Read more →]

health & medicaltrusted media & news

Fear itself

Today, I saw my first flu mask. A fellow wearing one stopped next to me on a downtown Boston street corner to wait for the sign to say “Walk.” I’d heard masks were useless against the Swine Flu unless they prevent air from getting in around the sides. His mask didn’t do that. It was too lose fitting. I was tempted to say something, but I just thought, “another victim of bad information.”

After the light changed and we went our separate ways, I was momentarily gripped by doubt. What did he know that I didn’t? Was there an outbreak hereabouts? Should I think about wearing one? Not the inadequate one he was wearing, but a good, close-fitting mask? Maybe, at that very moment I was breathing it in. [Read more →]

Bob Sullivan's top ten everythingtrusted media & news

The Octomom’s top ten Mother’s Day gifts

10. A siloful of Pampers

9. A five-gallon baby bottle with an octopus-shaped nipple

8. An in vitro sterilization kit

7. A birth video (extended director’s cut)

6. A gigantic shoe with room for 15

5. A copy of Jonathan Swift’s A Modest Proposal

4. Free spaying or neutering by Bob Barker

3. Name tags for all the kids

2. Four wet nurses

1. An inflatable Octodad

Bob Sullivan's top ten everythingon the law

Top ten excuses of Jason LeRoy Savage, recently found guilty of having sex with a carwash vacuum cleaner

10. Seriously, did you see that vacuum cleaner?!

9. Due to the bad economy, he was out of money for hookers.

8. She made the first move.

7. Just one in a series of girlfriends who sucked the life out of him.

6. He’s only human!

5. It was the anniversary of their first date.

4. Somebody had sudsed it up and it was looking particularly fine!

3. He was trying to make his home vacuum cleaner jealous.

2. It was purely physical; he didn’t want any attachments.

1. His wet vac was on the fritz.

Bob Sullivan's top ten everythingmoney

Top ten ways General Motors plans to cut costs

10. Car radios are being replaced by old cell phones with ten different ringtones

9. No more lunch breaks for their assembly line robots

8. They’re just sticking a GM frame on top of a Tata Nano

7. Car goes from zero to sixty in a day and a half

6. Instead of brakes, it’s an anchor and a rope

5. All Saturns are being downgraded to Plutos

4. The seatbelts are duct tape

3. For their multi-million-dollar bonuses, top executives will get only 99 cents on the dollar

2. In an emergency, your air bag has to be blown up by mouth

1. Your warranty extends until you get the car off the lot

Bob Sullivan's top ten everythingtrusted media & news

Top ten Somali pirates’ complaints

10. No employer-subsidized health care coverage

9. Parrot poop on their shoulders

8. Little chance of actually getting to meet Johnny Depp

7. Scurvy

6. Keep getting their swash caught in their buckle

5. No discount when eating at Long John Silver’s

4. People who keep coming up to them and saying, “Arrrrrrrr!!!”

3. Seriously, have you ever been to Somalia?

2. When they forget, and put their telescope up to the eye with the patch

1. Navy snipers

moneytrusted media & news

The crisis of credit visualized

If you have 11 minutes and some questions about how the credit markets got the way they are, you might like to watch The Short and Simple Story of the Credit Crisis by Jonathan Jarvis.

The 11-minute-long video is interesting not only because it attempts to define some fairly complicated financial terminology and processes, but also because of how it attempts to do so.  Jarvis says, “This project was completed as part of my thesis work in the Media Design Program, a graduate studio at the Art Center College of Design in Pasadena, California.”  Sure, it looks and sounds a bit like a PSA filmstrip from half a century ago.  But even ten years ago, what adult would have exposure to that sort of thing?

I find it fascinating to see this project specifically designed for the internet and aimed at adults.  As print newspapers are dying and the entire media industry is evolving to the new conditions of connectivity, this type of video may represent a large part of the future of educational journalism.

technologytrusted media & news

Siskel and Ebert and goodbye to all that

There is a characteristically gracious tribute by Roger Ebert in today’s Chicago Sun-Times to the memory of his colleague, counterpart and rival, Gene Siskel, who died ten years ago.

Part of what makes this encomium so affecting and sincere is that Ebert makes no secret of the fact that he and Siskel fought constantly and pretty much hated each other, though they genuinely loved and respected each other as well. They were like ill-matched brothers.

I was a witness to the “hate” half of the equation, having taken a couple of classes from Ebert in the early 80s, one of them on the films of Hitchcock and his imitators, and the other devoted entirely to profoundly esoteric and unclassifiable movies that Ebert was smart enough, and brave enough, to champion. During the classes, during the breaks, and even once while he and I were at adjacent urinals, Ebert compulsively uttered nasty but very funny cracks about Siskel that struck at the very core of Siskel’s personality and his predilections.

Ebert rarely alluded to what I suspect was his real objection to Siskel: While the two of them were for many years yoked together in the public eye as the pair of bickering film critics on their TV show “At the Movies,” there was nothing symmetrical about the relationship whatsoever. And I don’t just mean this in the clichéd sense that Ebert was “the fat one” and Siskel was “the skinny one.”

Ebert was, and remains, one of the best short-form essayists in America today, on any subject. The quality of his movie reviews over the years — written, remember, on a very strict deadline and in response to movies that are, in a few cases, literally beneath comment — has been close to miraculous.

Siskel, on the other hand, was a terrible writer. I used to know a Chicago Tribune reporter who would say, “you think his stuff is bad? You should see it before the editors get ahold of it.” [Read more →]

race & culturetrusted media & news

What’s all this monkey business?

There’s nothing funnier than a bullet riddled chimpanzee corpse to make a humorous point about the see-no-evil, hear-no-evil logic of Washington deal makers. At least that must have been the considered opinion of the editorial leadership of the New York Post when the best and brightest at the Post agreed to run the dead monkey gag by cartoonist Sean Delonas on the the paper’s saucy Page Six. On the pavement of the cartoon lies a great ape turned to Swiss cheese by bullet holes. Behind the smoking gun, from the mouth of the police officer who shot him, come the words, “They’ll have to find someone else to write the next stimulus bill.”

a bad cartoon

Har-Dee-Har-HAR-Dee-Har-HAR!

Boy, did he skewer the Washington elite with that topical gag “ripped out of the pages” of this week’s newspapers. See, there was this famous performing chimp in Stamford, Conn., that went nuts and almost killed an old lady. When police responded to a frantic 911 call from the animal’s owner, the chimpanzee named Travis turned its anger on the men in blue who — get this — ran away and jumped inside their patrol cars. Tee-hee!

Eventually, the police fired several shots at the 200-pound primate, which has between five to seven times the strength of a man that size. Travis ran back into his house where he was found dead inside his cage. His 70-year-old victim lies in a hospital bed clinging to life. Meanwhile President Barack Obama signed the $787 billion stimulus package that was greeted by investors on Wall Street with a 300-point drop in the Dow.

It was a perfect storm of non sequiturs. [Read more →]

ends & oddtrusted media & news

Obama honors the legacy of Lenin

For several months now, our television has been displaying those “closed caption” subtitles even though we don’t want them.  We just can’t figure out how to turn this feature off (we’ve tried all the obvious stuff on all of the menus, but nothing works.)  It can be annoying, especially when I’m watching my beloved UFC (mixed martial arts) on Spike TV, because the subtitles run across the top of the screen, inevitably cutting off the head of a fighter at just at the moment he gets clobbered with a spectacular spinning back fist.  So when Joe Rogan yells, and the screen displays, “WOW!  Did you see that punch!”, I tend to yell back at the screen, “NO!  I DIDN’T!”

But there’s a benefit to closed captioning: the hilarious errors that the computerized transcription system generates.  Tonight, for example, on the 10:00 news, there was a feature on President Obama’s tribute, earlier in the day, to Abraham Lincoln on the occasion of the 200th anniversary of Lincoln’s birth.  Except that, at the moment the announcer said, “today, President Obama honored the legacy of Lincoln,” the closed-caption subtitle read, “today, President Obama honored the legacy of Lenin.” 

I suppose that this could have been something other than a computer error.  For example, there may be a real live person who’s responsible for typing in the transcription, and he could have been spelling-disabled (which reminds me of the joke: “Two dyslexics walk into a bra…”) 

Another possibility is that the transcriber is unhappy with what he considers to be the socialistic implications of the Wall Street bailout, and, in the grand tradition of the Boston Globe staffer who inserted the headline “Mush from the Wimp” over an otherwise sober editorial about Jimmy Carter, was committing a nasty little political grafitto.  If the latter is the case, I suspect he’ll be getting a bit of a spinning back fist of his own from his bosses tomorrow morning.

 

books & writingtrusted media & news

Is print really dead?

I went to a mixer last night that was, according to the invitation, to be on the topic of “publishing,” and brought along a friend, a publicist for a boutique publishing house in the Chicago suburbs, who was looking to do some networking and meet some of her peers.

As it turned out however, two of the three advertised speakers (the third didn’t show up) were members of what I like to call the Screen-Based Community, which is to say professional bloggers, and the discussion was entirely about online publishing, micro-blogs, corporate blogs, and the like. 

Attempting to be a devil’s advocate and a mild-to-moderate pain in the ass, I tried during the discussion session that followed the presentations to question the largely unquestioned assumption by at least one of the presenters that, as he put it, “print is dying a slow and painful death.”

It is inarguable that many print publications are exhibiting these days all of the signs of “cachexia” (wasting away), and it is equally inarguable that, if present trends continue, we may sooner or later be left with only a handful of print newspapers — the Wall Street Journal, USA Today, and so on — and few if any of the traditional city newspapers.  Here in Chicago, in fact, there appears to be a spirited race between the Chicago Sun-Times and the Chicago Tribune to see whose pulp incarnation will disappear first.

Magazines, most of them anyway, would appear to be in trouble too, as their lifeline, advertising, slowly bleeds away to the Web.

But, as I pointed out during the discussion, “present trends almost never continue.”  The reason is that technology trends, and trends in general, rarely if ever move in a straight and predictable line, and are instead subject to reconsiderations, reversals, and revivals of older and seemingly abandoned methodologies.  [Read more →]

diatribestrusted media & news

News reporting hits a new . . . idea

In an ever-escalating drive to bring news reporting to the very pinnacle of triteness, NBC Nightly News offered coverage of a plane falling into the Hudson River today along these lines: “So much could have gone wrong that didn’t; so let’s hear from our experts on some of the things that could have gone wrong.”

Go, Brian Williams! When the news isn’t exciting enough,* reporting on news that might have been — what a concept!

“The weather today was exactly what is normally expected this time of year; let’s hear from our experts on how a tsunami would have affected the economy of the tri-state area.”

“Charles Barkley was arrested today for drunken driving; let’s hear from our sportscaster how it would have played out had he walked into a church and started singing along with the choir.”

“The president made a few routine decisions and signed a couple of unremarkable laws; let’s hear from our political commentators what would have happened if he’d asked Congress to approve funds for a bicycle trip to the Moon.”

________________________

* Because nobody died; but this guy is the new Joe the Plumber. His autobiography will come out in 2009, followed by a run for Congress in 2010.

art & entertainmenttrusted media & news

Anderson Cooper and Kathy Griffin ring in 2009 for CNN

At 9:30pm on New Year’s Eve my friend’s two-year-old son threw up. They left by 10pm. My kids were asleep by 10:45pm. My husband and I took our respective drinks to the couch. We flipped through the channels and were bored by everything on. We didn’t want to put on a movie. We wanted to see and feel the spirit of the night (even though we weren’t actively participating in anything very exciting ourselves). For us that meant watching the ball drop in Times Square. I’ve been to Times Square four times to ring-in the New Year but this year I was perfectly content to be with my family; maybe even, as others have said, I couldn’t think of a single happier way to ring in the new year.

So, we chose to watch the pre and post ball-dropping commentary on television. However, I did want to be, at least slightly, entertained — and Dick Clark’s New Year’s Eve doesn’t do it for me anymore. Really, I just can’t stand Ryan Seacrest. So we turned to CNN. Really, we did!

Anderson Cooper had Kathy Griffin co-host the evening with him. What a ridiculously unlikely combination. We flipped to CNN thinking we were going to switch out just as quickly as we’d found them. We didn’t. We stayed. And we liked it. They had a lot of time to fill and did a really good job making people feel like they were part of the evening. I’ve never been a fan of Kathy’s — her humor just never did anything for me. However, for this one evening, she was the perfect ying to Anderson’s yang.

Did anyone else watch? Did I miss fabulous programming somewhere? Let me know so I can make note for next year!

terror & wartrusted media & news

A Pearl in the rough

So it’s December 7th and the day is just about to come to a close.

With nary a mention of Pearl Harbor in public media, at least, through a day’s worth of checking into CNN and flipping around the radio.

Usually, there’s some mention — it may get one on the 11:00 news tonight. I’ll find out in a few minutes. It may have received some mention this morning, but I didn’t watch the news this morning. I didn’t look at the paper. I’ll admit I didn’t go out of my way to find it.

I didn’t really have to; though I’m far from having lived through it, the mention of December 7th automatically brings to my inner ear Roosevelt’s “a date which will live in infamy”, and some tangible imagining of the ripples of the fear and anger that gripped Americans on that day.

What happened?

[Read more →]

language & grammartrusted media & news

Comma Chameleon

Here, taken verbatim from an obituary in the Chicago Sun-Times, is the amazing story of a woman who succumbed in old age to a terrible disease, then by some mysterious agency was given a second chance at life, and took full advantage of it by enjoying another 79 years:   

“Born June 18, 1929 after a long struggle with Alzheimer’s disease, departed this life on Saturday, November 7, 2008.”

Good karma?  Nah, bad comma.

 

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