10. When the umpire yells “Play ball!” your entire team runs to second base
9. They feel weak and listless without their Twinkies
8. One player gets injured standing for the National Anthem
7. A runner gets thrown out for stealing the dugout
6. When a sports writer compares your cleanup batter to Ruth, he means Ruth Buzzi
5. You keep hearing arguments about how many strikes to an out
4. When you tell a player to take left field, he asks, “My left or your left?”
3. Every time the pitcher throws the ball, the catcher dives out of the way
2. When your leadoff hitter gets to first, he has to ask for directions to second
1. It’s a hockey team
Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.
- Author Bio [1]
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Bob Sullivan [3]
Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus [4] (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 [5] and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.
Latest posts by Bob Sullivan (Posts [6])
- Top ten reasons this will be my last Top Ten List [7] - April 30, 2018
- Top ten more syntax one-liners [8] - April 23, 2018
- Top ten more alcohol one-liners [9] - April 16, 2018
- Top ten more dog one-liners [10] - April 9, 2018
- Top ten revelations in the Stormy Daniels 60 Minutes interview [11] - April 2, 2018