10. “Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck both claim paying taxes contributes to socialism.”

9. “Wealthy people who are exceptionally good-looking should be exempt.”

8. “On April first, I got an e-mail saying that, as part of the stimulus package, there was a tax moratorium this year.”

7. “Trying to use the Qualified Dividends and Capital Gains Tax Worksheet, I got a severe brain cramp.”

6. “My buddy at the post office said he could backdate my return.”

5. “After I claim all the voices in my head as deductions, it turns out they owe me money!”

4. “This year, in the box labeled ‘For Office Use Only,’ I just plan to write ‘Approved – Send massive refund!’”

3. “Fill out a tax form?! I can’t even get my VCR to stop blinking ‘12:00’!”

2. “My accountant said I could deduct my late fees.”

1. “I just woke up from my New Year’s Eve party.”
 

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

Tags: Bob Sullivan's top ten everything, damned lies, money, politics & government by Bob Sullivan
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I just read an interesting article at The Nation.  It was posted by Johann Hari on April 15th, and is entitled “Climategate Claptrap, II“.

[Read more →]

Tags: science by Mike McGowan
12 Comments »

My son came home the other night and said Ms. Joanne (his pre-school teacher) taught him a new song. He started to sing. My husband almost had a coronary. You see, Ms. Joanne taught him the Mets theme song, “Meet the Mets.” I thought it was funny. My husband looked like someone had just stabbed him in the heart. [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, sports by Amy Boshnack
7 Comments »

Larry Greene, a NYC man, was arraigned this past Wednesday on a second-degree murder charge after fatally punching his 7-month-old son. SEVEN. MONTHS. OLD. “Toughen up!” That’s what he yelled as he struck this tiny, crying, helpless child. He could face 25 years to life in prison if convicted. If convicted? He admitted to doing it. And do you know why he said he did it? According to The Inquisitr he (allegedly) told investigators that “he was jealous because the infant was more attached to the mother than to him.” Raise your hand if you have deep-seeded mommy issues! Come on, Larry. Let’s see that hand you sick bastard. [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, going parental by Jaclyn Roth
3 Comments »

I am totally digging my new chicken recipe.  I use Wegmans Parmesan Italian Dressing and Weber’s Garlic and Herb spice.  Cooking is a pretty macho things these days, think about it — look at the guys on TV — Bobby Flay, Emeril, Guy Fieri, and Alton Brown. Well, 3 out of 4 ain’t bad. I would like to think I am a pretty decent cook — and love cooking on the grill.  Since the weather has turned, I have grilled practically every night.  So I got this stuff from Wegmans and added in the spice — then rubbed it all over the chicken and basted it while it was cooking. Wow, was it good.  The local potheads came floating towards my house like zombies when they smelled the amazing aromas coming off of my overworked grill. Most importantly, the girlfriend gave it the seal of approval.  Sadly, the potheads are all still milling around in my backyard waiting for me to make the chicken again.   [Read more →]

Tags: Marty digs, movies, recipes & food, television by Marty O'Connor
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Introducing RTB: RottenTomatoBot, the hero who does everything within his power to protect the cinematic art form from moronic film critics!

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Tags: movies by Ricky Sprague
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In Lost‘s “Everybody Loves Hugo,” Richard complains that Jacob “never tells us what to do.” Richard’s frustration echoes clearly into our world. For most of us, Jacob, aka God, never seems to tell us what to do. He just sits back and lets us make our own mistakes, leading to countless horrors and suffering. For many, this is a major argument as to why there is no God. Yet, when watching Lost, we see that Jacob does in fact tell the Losties what to do — sometimes directly, sometimes through his lists or clues, and sometimes through messages that he passes on through his emissaries. But certainly this doesn’t happen in our world. Here, there are no ghosts of Michaels past, otherworldly whispers, or visits from dimension-hopping Desmonds to guide us on our journey through life. Or…is there?
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Tags: religion & philosophy, television by Marc Oromaner
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“Always keep the hose’s stream of water between the fire and you,” I recall my Navy fire instructor telling me so many years ago.

If you let the flames get around you, I learned, they’ll reach out and hit you like a boxer’s jab. That’s what happened to me when I was an 18-year-old sailor attending the U.S. Navy Fire Fighting School in San Diego.

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Tags: on thrillers and crime by Paul Davis
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The award goes to the CBS News crew for their little gem entitled “Poll: Most Tea Party Supporters Say Their Taxes Are Fair”.  I seriously cannot believe that this is what passes for reporting.  My five year old could do better than this.

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Tags: politics & government by Mike McGowan
2 Comments »

Britney Spears released photos of herself — without airbrushing! Jessica Simpson appeared on the cover of Marie Claire — with no makeup!

I say: why stop there?

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Tags: art & entertainment, photography by Neil Verma
2 Comments »

Driving to Philadelphia isn’t particularly difficult. I’ve done it before with little trouble, receiving only a handful of horns and expletives for my efforts. Why I chose to opt for Greyhound last weekend is still unclear. Maybe I felt lazy. Maybe I thought I’d save gas money. Maybe I just lost my damn mind. 

Yeah. The last one.  [Read more →]

Tags: diatribes, travel & foreign lands by Sarah Ameigh
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Humberto Fontova, a Cuban-American writer and speaker, has written two interesting pieces on the 49th anniversary of the anti-Castro, anti-Communist Bay of Pigs invasion of Cuba.

Fontova writes about the heroism of the anti-Castro Brigade after they were left on the Cuban beach without the American military support promised by the Kennedy administration, and how Ernesto Che Guevara responded to the anti-Castro assault. The so-called great guerrilla fighter shot himself.

My latest post at my blog, http://pauldavisoncrime.blogspot.com, has links to both of Fontova’s pieces and my interview with Fontova about his book, Exposing the Real Che Guevara and the Useful Idiots Who Idolize him.     

Tags: terror & war by Paul Davis
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Pedophiles across the UK today mourned the loss of the Paedo bikini as it was removed from the shelves of discount clothing store Primark. Padded bikini tops for kids as young as seven? Really? That’s just disgusting. What is wrong with people? Why would anyone in their right mind want to sexualize a child by helping them appear busty at the age of seven? SEVEN! I’m glad Primark succumbed to the pressure to remove the bikinis, but really? How about a knee to the nuts of the company that manufactured them in the first place? Oh, to be a fly on the wall of the conference room where these sick bastards brainstormed ways to market this disgusting product. I wonder how many of them, if any, have daughters. Douche bags.

Tags: family & parenting, fashion & clothing by Jaclyn Roth
2 Comments »

January 29, 2010
I dream I am on a trip with my brother and in a subway station he buys a huge supply of government hotdogs. After he thinks about it, he realizes he has been rooked by the diminutive hotdog man. Normally, he would sue in this situation, but since the diminutive hotdog vendor is a city employee and Dan is reluctant to implicate former mayor, Ed Rendell, he resigns himself to being rooked. Meanwhile, we have to transport the huge supply of hotdogs and accompanying furniture, and we run into Betsy who tells me that Dan should get out on the social networking websites more frequently. I tell her he’s out on those from time to time, but she says not enough. I say, “How do you know? Have you even gone out with him?” She says, “Yes.” I am livid because neither my brother nor Betsy told me about the date. I also wonder why she and I had never gone out on a date.

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Tags: Fred's dreams by Fred Siegel
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Yes, The Square has an adulterous affair, a bag of money, a construction site and teeming rain — all the de rigueur components for noir thrillers.  But Aussie filmmaker (and former stunt man) Nash Edgerton directs his first full length feature with crisp pacing, effectively placed shocks and just the right amount of humor. [Read more →]

Tags: Gail sees a movie, movies by Gail D. Rosen
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Today, kids, we’re going to talk about the pregnant clusterfuck that is the Internet.

It used to be that buying concert tickets was part of a larger experience that began with the release of a new album and ended in the parking lot of a smoke-filled arena.

The experience, for all intents and purposes, began and ended in a parking lot. [Read more →]

Tags: diatribes, music by David A. Brensilver
4 Comments »

Recently, I was made aware of the fact that the congress passed a health care reform action, of some sort. I don’t know what’s in it, but I don’t feel bad about that, because the people in congress who voted for it also don’t know what’s in it, either.

In a new report, the Congressional Research Service says the law may have significant unintended consequences for the “personal health insurance coverage” of senators, representatives and their staff members.

[Read more →]

Tags: health & medical, politics & government by Ricky Sprague
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True or False:
1. The safest seats on an airplane are at the back.
2. If you fall into a frozen lake, you have only 3 minutes to escape the water.
3.  In prisoner-of-war camps in Vietnam, optimists lived longer than anyone else.

Who lives and who dies in a crisis?  Do you have what it takes to be one of the passengers who walks out of the jungle after a plane crash or who keeps their cool and remembers how to work a compass when you get lost in the woods?  And if you don’t (or can’t) can you learn?  There are lots of books on survival tips and I have read more than a few of them.  The Survivor’s Club: The Secrets and Science that Could Save Your Life by Ben Sherwood takes familiar territory and still turns it into a very interesting read.

[Read more →]

Tags: books & writing, Lisa Reads by Lisa Hura
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Have you ever paid to watch a baseball umpire? I didn’t think so. Someone needs to get that message to Joe West, as he has never seemed to understand that during his long career calling baseball games. [Read more →]

Tags: bad sports, good sports by Alan Spoll
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10. After three of the questions on the tax form, he’s just written “Huh?”

9. It takes him a half hour to figure out his tip at Red Lobster.

8. He tends to whimper and say, “Nummers is hard!”

7. His last client was Nicholas Cage.

6. He swears “umpteen” is a real number.

5. He checks off the box for “joint filing,” then lights one up.

4. He keeps insisting, “No, you’re wrong! They’re due on August 15th!”

3. You notice that his calculator is really a TV remote.

2. After every number on your tax form, he’s written “or so.”

1. He likes to do his calculating in the nude, so he can count up to 21.
 

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

Tags: Bob Sullivan's top ten everything, money by Bob Sullivan
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