Going Parental: Cyrus Family Intervention Needed
I received a ton of feedback on last week’s blog about music, your car and your kids. As a result, I thought I’d approach the topic from a different perspective. I am all about exposing my daughter to all kinds of music. I think music is instrumental in a child’s development. In fact, my friend Pam (her website just went up so cut her some slack) just started her own business — she is going to be providing musical entertainment at children’s birthday parties. I was happy to hear about it because her approach is authentic. She’s not just coming in to distract your kids for an hour so you can bullshit with your friends. She’s coming in to actually teach them something about music — without them even knowing it. She believes that music inspires children and can be instrumental in their development. That’s what I’m talking about.
Anyway — enough about Pam.
I was at my sister-in-law’s house this past weekend hanging with our kids. My daughter is three, her son is three and her oldest daughter is 5. Her 5-year-old asked if I’d like to hear the song she performed at her camp concert. “Of course I would, let’s hear it.”
My kingdom for a rewind button on that moment.
She proceeded to sing the song “The Climb,” by Miley Cyrus. I instantly threw up in my mouth so badly that my nose began to burn. Miley Cyrus? Seriously? That’s the best her camp could do? Gross.
My sister-in-law immediately came to her defense saying the lyrics to the song are actually very good and like it or not, that’s what the kids are listening to these days. Really? Are they? Five-year-olds are listening to this garbage? No. Someone’s playing it for them. Whether it’s the parents, older brothers and/or sisters –they’re only gaining access to it at this age if you are allowing it.
Look, I get it. These teeny bopper kids that the Disney machine has continued to shit out are a force to be reckoned with. They are unstoppable. All I can do is try to keep my kid away from them for as long as possible. I know that she’ll reach an age where it doesn’t matter what I say or do — she’s going to listen to what she wants. I did. It’s inevitable. But at 5? No. I’m sorry. But no fucking way.
There is no valid argument for teaching 5-year-olds the lyrics to a song — I don’t care how “uplifting” it is — that is being sung by a 16 year old girl that just performed at a children’s awards show wearing underwear and pole dancing on top of an ice cream cart. That is not ok. In fact, that’s appalling. It’s inappropriate and disturbing.
What the hell, Billy Ray Cyrus? Where are you, man? Just because you had the most notorious mullet in the history of mullets doesn’t mean you’re too cool to parent. Besides, now you’ve got this mid-life crisis type of blow out that makes you look more like a Backstreet Boy circa 1998. You’re a douche. Get over yourself, your hair and your dead career and start acting like a father. I don’t know a single parent that would allow their 16-year-old daughter to go out on a stage in front of millions of people and behave that way. It’s reprehensible and you should be ashamed of yourself… and your stupid hair. Seriously.
Going Parental appears every Thursday. Pam appears upon request, and Miley Cyrus appears daily despite all my best efforts.
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Couldn’t agree with you more. As appalling and inappropriate 16 year Miley Cyrus and the stripper pole was…. check out her NINE year old sister and friends…
http://hollywooddame.com/2009/08/07/miley-cyrus-little-sister-noah-stripper-pole-party-photos/
Very sad and disturbing…..
Can Billy Ray be one of the “people who should be killed this week”?
Hahaha… unfortunately I disagree. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with kids, even at the age of 5, listening to Miley Cyrus. Her performance at the Teen Choice Awards was blown WAY out of proportion as usual. And if they’re 5, they shouldn’t be watching the Teen Choice Awards. Until she becomes the debacle that is Britney Spears, kids should look up to her. The Climb and Party In The USA are nice, fun songs for kids… some 20+ year olds probably find them and her annoying (I happen to enjoy a little Party in the USA), but as far as the kiddies go… enjoy. The problem occurs when the same kids are listening to Miley friendly radio stations (like z100) in the car because their parents have it on and Disco Stick by Lady Gaga starts playing. In that case, it’s not their fault!
Hey Jack-
First good luck to Pam…
Secondly I agree w u but not all of us r musically inclined to teach our kids about music. Better for those who can. Decency and morals don’t define the music only the people!
U would love the movie “Bandslam.”
Xo Lori
I agree – a 5-year-old shouldn’t be watching the Teen Choice Awards – which only strengthens my argument that they also shouldn’t be encouraged by their camp to sing songs by scantily clad 16-year-olds performing on the same show.
The problem is that the kids don’t just listen to the songs and move on these days. They emulate these singers. They look up to them, they want to be like them. If Miley Cyrus wants to be a role model, which she is whether she likes it or not – then she needs to put on some clothes, turn off her webcam and get a fucking education. Her demographic is young girls ages 7-15. That’s sad.
But seriously, nothing is sadder than Billy Ray’s hair. I mean for real.
That’s where good parenting comes in. Kids are emulating their heroes at young ages everyday… whether it be Miley, Chris Brown or Alex Rodriguez. No matter how these entertainers and athletes influence children, the parents are the ones who need to teach them right and wrong.
Billy Ray should have been stopped at Achy Breaky Heart.
Threw up in your mouth. Really? It’s not the music I would choose to listen to but come on, she’s 5 and I don’t think that song in particular is truly vomit worthy. I can only imagine what you would say if you saw me singing Garth Brooks back in college. Because there is no better song than Friends in Low Places when you are drunk at a dive college bar!
The only time I really want to shoot myself is when my daughter is asking for Best of Both Worlds for the 3rd time on a short car ride, but you will see, you can not control every aspect of your kids lives. And yes – I am kicking myself for downloading it from itunes for her! But you will see! My daughter is just starting the part of her life where she will need to make decisions on her own and choose things for herself, and I will interfere when necessary; however, it will be much more important to me that she defends the fat kid getting made fun of or talks to the one kid everyone ignores because they have a stutter than what music she listens to. You will see Ms. Jaclyn. There are some battles not worth fighting, and may actually fun to watch.
That camp show where 20 5 & 6-year-olds sang The Climb was fantastic… and I promise you — when it’s your kid up there (because surely, she will be) you will be cheering along and up front with a camera in hand! And she will come home possibly doing things that seem a lot worse than singing Miley after being at camp for 8 hours with other peoples kids!
You can’t make outside influences disappear, all you can do is help guide your kid to make the best choices possible… Miley is low on my list.
If Miley’s music is fun and kids like it – great I don’t have an issue with that. But why are they sexualising a teenage girl whose fans are 5 – 12 year old girls? Why is she half dressed dancing round a stripper pole? Is this for her fans?? Do they know / understand what they are seeing? Will they like her less if she is fully dressed?
The similarities between Miley and Britney are startling. I believe it’s only a matter of time before Miley also loses it and she will be in rehab before her 18th birthday. She (like Britney) is being forced to grow up much too fast and with no one really looking out for her (Miley the girl, not Miley the product).
It’s really depressing that this is what our young girls have to “look up to”.
As a non parent, but, a former kid myself…. I totally disagree. I know my opinion won’t matter much because of the “unless your a parent you will never know” argument i am sure i will hear, but I can’t imagine how listening or singing along to Miley Cyrus is harmful to your children. Sure, you don’t have to agree with what she wears or poles she dances on, but is she really that bad of a person? Has she taken drugs in public? Has she beat up anyone? Has she engaged in a dog fighting ring? C’mon – she’s an entertainer, she goes to church every Sunday and she is nice to her fans.
If she was 17 or 18 would it be more acceptable? What age do you draw the line? You said you let your kids listen to Madonna and Frank Zappa. Don’t you agree that Madonna’s lyrics are 100x worse than Miley and that Frank Zappa was on more drugs than Billy Mays? Role models?
Speaking of which, I never get the whole role model thing either. My role models were my parents. Of course I grew up idolizing baseball players and basketball players but they didn’t shape who i was. I listened to Michael Jackson but I didn’t grow up getting plastic surgery, dressing weird or molesting little kids.
I’ll leave it at that. Of course people are gonna have different feelings on this and I get it, but i think your argument is way off…in my humble opinion. After reading your other blogs, I’m actually surprised you feel so strongly about this issue but I respect your opinion.
Oh and for the record, I don’t listen to Miley Cyrus!
When Cali was 3, she was perfect. Then she turned 4 and became a little shit. Now she is 5 and is pretty much an adult minus the boobs.
Amy is right- you have to pick your battles. If Miley was singing about the pole she was dancing on I could understand…as much as she makes you throw up in your mouth, there are MUCH WORSE things to get your panties in a twist about! Miley poses no “danger” to my kid. (Who by the way, sang “Best of Both Worlds” at her camp show and it was pretty damn cute to see!) I will tell you, that I generally keep Cali away from things I find annoying on TV (Fresh Beat Band anyone?). One day it occurred to me that she might be the only kid who had no idea what a Jonas was. (Nick is the cutest if you were wondering). I want her to be able to relate and then make her own choice on what she likes. She is not a follower so I don’t worry about it.
Hey sista..
Hmm.. I have to say that I do agree with some of the other postings on this one.
Also, as a parent of an almost 5 year old.. you will see, them loving Miley, or her song is not the end of the world, so to speak. There are alot worse, and more important things I could think of that would want to make me throw up in my mouth.
Remember sometimes I would tell you and Jami, just wait.. you’lle see… and then you do, and say, “yeah, you are right”..
this is very trivial to me.. let the 5 year old dance, to whatever song, and smile and cry because you are so proud of her up on that stage, Miley isn’t the worst music for a 5 year old.
“youll’e see!!” LoL
Wen
Hello
Another good article, and some very interesting responses.
Miley Cyruses are a dime a dozen; as soon as this one implodes, another will be plucked from the conveyor belt to fill her ever-so-short short shorts and inappropriate boob-tubes of various sorts. She’s the showbusiness equivalent of beer vernacular – when Miley Regular ceases to enthral, Miley Light will come along to take the reigns; then Miley Diet; Miley Low-Carb will quickly follow. Miley Traditional will eventually be supped by millions.
It’s all the same crap. Miley No-Taste would be the appropriate moniker for the particular brand of non-nourishment she and her masters are positing.
But it would be unfair to blame this poor girl for all that is happening around her. As I commented in a response to Louisa Wright’s article on Hilary’s Bad Hair Day, the female role models our nation’s young are afforded by the media have been completely subjugated by the debasement of femininity in popular culture, to the extent that the virtues of femininity in general culture has been completely eclipsed.
Miley is a mere passenger in this unfortunate juggernaut.
We cannot comprehend a George Eliot, a Virginia Woolf, a Jayne Austen; even a Lady Macbeth. Because our culture predicates that women – girls, females – are silly, tittering, hair-flicking simpletons, who worship at the pole around which Miley’s thighs smear their various immature fluids.
The tragedy is, Virginia Woolf was an exceptionally good looking woman. If only she was around today. She could have advertised Chanel and written A Room Of One’s Own.
In reviewing everyone’s comments here, it’s become apparent that I wasn’t quite clear with what I was trying to say.
1 – I don’t blame Miley – I blame her parents, her agents and whoever else out there has her believing her actions (AS A 16 YEAR OLD) are appropriate.
2 – Listening to Miley, Taylor Swift, The Jonas Bros., etc isn’t going to damage our (my) children – I’m aware of this – it’s just going to get them hooked on shitty music with no soul.
3 – I am a huge music lover – I believe it inspires, ignites, and is incredibly therepeutic – therefor this is a battle I have chosen to stay on top of for my daughters sake. Music is art – in my opinion it is art in one of it’s purest forms. So I will indeed fight this battle. Because with the music comes an image – one our children grow to believe is an accurate depiction of who they should be – their friends will encourage them to think so and so I will try to be the voice of reason in her other ear. I’m her mother – it’s what I will always do.
If she wants to listen to this garbage, I’m not going to stop her – I’d be a fool to think I could – I’ll just make sure she knows that she only has to be one thing – and that is herself – a happy kid that will never dance on a pole.
Thanks for all of your comments – I love it!