Kids ask: Why is the sky blue?
But why, mommy? How many times do you get that question — about any number of topics? Maybe it’s three times a day or maybe it’s three times an hour. To make your life a little easier I’ve given you ten answers to the simple question: Mommy, why is the sky blue?
1) It’s not. You’re drunk. Oh no, wait, I’m drunk.
2) Its blue because of molecules and stuff, I think. I don’t know. I cut science class a lot. Go watch TV.
3) Because God’s favorite color is blue. When he’s mad his favorite color is grey. He’s been mad lately at the Northeast.
4) Google it.
5) Isn’t there a Dora episode that can answer that?
6) Go ask your father (or nanny or grandmother or any other adult in the house).
7) A whole bunch of Smurfs were flying in hot-air balloons when some rich jerk shooting rifles off his yacht hit them and the little blue guys disintegrated into the air (like all mythical figures do when shot) — and that made the sky blue.
8) Because God is a boy and boys like blue. Except for Uncle Steve – he likes pink. It’s a long story, go to your room.
9) The blue color of the sky is due to Rayleigh scattering. What’s Rayleigh? See answer #2.
10) The sky is blue because it’s sad. You know why it’s sad? Because you cry too much.
Special thanks to Going Parental blogger Jaclyn Roth for providing inspiration and some fine answers to this question.
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We do make a brilliant team.
I find that a good all-purpose answer to any inconvenient question is, “What are you, a cop?” But then again, I don’t have children.