Broadway
May 22, 2009
I dream I am at the buffet outside the Broadway show, Wicked. A family stops me and insists I sit with them. I say I have to sit with my wife, but they absolutely have to talk to me. The woman holds my hand and starts reading my fortune. She tells me a number of things about myself that are true, but also sort of obvious. I tell her that she is full of shit and if she tries to talk to me again I’m going to call the police. Then, when I sit down with my wife, a woman walks by and says she needs money for a new vagina. I tell her new vaginas are at the other end of the buffet. Finally, I try to put on my shoes in front of an audio animatronic Oz diorama. My shoes, however, are baby-sized. The servers are amazed that I get my feet into them.
April 14, 2008
I dream I am with Gail and Deborah and Eric seeing, for the second time for me and Gail, Xanadu on Broadway. It is Deborah and Eric’s first time, and Eric is blind. The first time Gail and I saw it we had fabulous seats. This time, however, it is an enormous theater complex with many rooms, and we are seated in an auxiliary room. It’s as if we are in an adjoining restaurant rather than in the theater. Before the show starts, Eric and I take a walk through the complex and we get lost. We can’t find our way back to our seats. We wander for at least a half hour, and the show must have started. We find various rooms, but never the room with Gail and Deborah. We are very angry. People try to help us, including an obese Indian guide, but even she fails.
December 22, 1993
I dream in the format of a Broadway musical about a megalomaniacal director/choreographer. The director finds a hunky young dancer and puts him into the show, mostly because he is attracted to him. Another dancer, less hunky, is hired as an understudy. The understudy loves the director, but the director doesn’t care. The hunky dancer uses the director for whatever advancement he can get. The hunky dancer goes golfing with the director and acts as his caddy while the understudy sits under a nearby tree and sings songs of love.
“Fred’s Dreams” appears every Wednesday.
Latest posts by Fred Siegel (Posts)
- Broadway Fred: Finishing the Hat - February 9, 2011
- Broadway Fred: How to Succeed…. - January 26, 2011
- Broadway Fred: Getting Selkie - January 19, 2011
- Broadway Fred: La Cage Aux Folles - January 12, 2011
- Broadway Fred: Dances with death - January 5, 2011
Print This Post
“I tell her new vaginas are at the other end of the buffet.”
Not a line you read every day. Very funny.
Not a line you read every day?
Obviously, Scott, you’ve never read VERY GOOD BLINTZES, JEEVES by P. G. Wodehouse.