Four years ago and four years before that, I was registered to vote in Northern California.  Just as in the current election, the chances of California going to anyone other than a Democrat was somewhere between slim and none.  So, while technically speaking, California’s 55 votes in the electoral college are consistently important, simply because of the sway those votes could carry, in practice, one’s individual vote seems somehow less vital, more diluted.  Regardless of which candidate you, your friends, or your neighbors select, the Democrat at the top of the ticket is likely to get the nod.  Oh, how I miss those halcyon hippy days!

In Ohio, things are different. At least, the itinerary of the candidates (to say nothing of the robocalls) seems to suggest that a single Ohio vote is immensely important….. important enough, perhaps, that if such a notion were not a) a felony and b) completely contrary to the “spirit of democracy,”  I’d suggest allowing those votes be put on eBay.  By the second week of November, at least seven states would no longer have a credit crisis.  Our housing market would stabilize. After all, if the RNC can spend $150,000 on a running mate’s wardrobe and Obama can spend more than $4 million on a half-hour prime-time advertisement, how much would an actual vote be worth?

***

Last week, I stopped at a gas station and went inside to pick something up.  A soda or a cappuccino that magically appears when hot water is added.  While at the counter to pay for my beverage, I ventured a little small talk with the clerk about the upcoming elections.   As long as you keep it non-partisan, there’s no easier conversation starter at this time of year.  (Of course, if you let your partisanship show through too much, duck).

I asked if she was excited about the election. 

She said she wasn’t. 

“It doesn’t make any difference who wins. One’s as bad as the other.”

I don’t know anything else about her story, but I would like to know how, in an election where the key campaign metaphor for both parties has been change, she could expect that neither candidate could make any real, material difference in her life — in the amount of money she has in her bank account, in her prospects for a better job, or in the sort of future her children might see.

Is she alone?  How common is such disenfranchisement now?

***

On Friday, a few hours before a quick jaunt to New York to make his (admittedly) hilarious appearance on SNL, John McCain appeared at a rally in Steubenville, Ohio. Steubenville, nestled alongside the Ohio River on the eastern edge of the state amid picturesque oak-and-pine covered hills, was once a thriving bedroom community for one of the regions many steel mills.  Now, unless I’m mistaken, the largest employer is either Franciscan University  or Wal-Mart.  When the votes are counted, which candidate do you suppose that county will support?  

Before you answer, keep in mind that both Dean Martin and Traci Lords (yes, that Traci Lords) hail from Steubenville.

***

When my wife and I returned home yesterday, we watched Obama’s speech from Nippert stadium on the University of Cincinnati campus, which is about 10 miles from our house.

That same evening, Sarah Palin, hockey mom, pit bull, and future presidential candidate, campaigned in Clermont County, which is just east of Cincinnati.

How much better off would Ohio be if all the resources that have been poured into our television commercials, stump speeches, robocalls, mailers, and door-to-door volunteers went to, um, Ohio? 

***

While visiting my in-laws in Steubenville over the weekend, I found myself explaining the difference between child abuse and abortion to my nephew, who is in junior high.  It is, trust me, a conversation I would have preferred not to have. But what could I say when he told me that voting for Obama would mean that parents could hit their children on the heads with sticks?

Regardless of the efficacy of my explanation, my nephew is solidly in the McCain camp. In fact, while trick-or-treating on Friday, he noticed that he didn’t like people who support the Obama campaign.  In fact, he hated them.  Why? 

Apparently, they weren’t giving out candy.   No comment on observer bias, here, but I am hopeful that he learned simply to hate people who don’t give out candy on Halloween — regardless of their political leanings.    

I attempted, perhaps foolishly, to explain to that nephew and my 8-year-old niece the difference between Obama and McCain on the basis of Federalism, which of course, works marvelously until you encounter issues like gay marriage and pro-choice vs. pro-life.    

My cousin, likewise, spoke briefly to my niece about politics.  After much confusion and what was doubtless no small amount exasperation, my niece said, “I don’t think we should even have a president.”

“Oh,” my cousin said, “so you’re in favor of anarchy?”

Her little brow furrowed. “Who’s he?” she asked.

***

Tomorrow, my wife and I will be at the polls as early as we can manage.  We’re both looking forward to it.  History will be made — regardless of which candidate wins.

But this is Ohio.  Just as in 2004, this year, a variety of legal challenges have surfaced in the Ohio courts — even going so far as to claim that Obama is not an American citizen (even though, you sort of have to be a citizen to be a senator….) So, I honestly don’t know what to expect. Will I see intimidation?  An instance of fraud?  Absurdly long lines in those districts that are likely to sway toward one or another of the candidates?

I’m worried that people in my district will have one of the most fundamental rights of the American citizenry stripped from them — without compensation — over…um…politics.   

I hope, of course, that such fears are unfounded, but even the fact that we have such fears makes you wonder, doesn’t it?  Why can’t Jimmy Carter monitor our elections?

At the very least, I plan to get my “I voted” sticker.  After all, in today’s economy, how could I pass up free coffee?

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