AI overlord inevitability?: My fantasy team says no

AI overlord inevitability?: My fantasy team says no

Posted on January 19th, 2024 by Scott Warnock

Many of us spent 2023 wallowing in doubt and self-pity about the inevitable rise of AI. Unbridled academic cheating. Deep fakes. The death of creativity. We feared humanity was done for!

But as I sit perched atop my family fantasy football league–the champ!–I declare that humanity has a few more gasps left.

Last summer, my nephew organized an overpopulated 14-team family league: me, my three kids, their seven cousins, my brother-in-law and sister-in-law, and my one niece’s boyfriend (another niece had a GM/consultant family friend–the more the merrier!).

We’re geographically dispersed, so it was a great way to stay in touch (and talk trash).

In our chaotic draft, many “owners” had a low football acumen and auto-drafted, letting an enigmatic AI pick their players. After the draft, the AI spit this out about my team: “Scott was positioned nicely with a favorable draft pick, but assembled a team that will need to overachieve according to the pundits.” My prospects appeared dim, the AI starkly reported:

Draft grade: C
Projected record: 3-11
Projected finish: T12

12th place!

Ah, but what the AI didn’t know. The AI didn’t see it coming, but suspended Saints running back Alvin Kamara and injured Colts RB Jonathan Taylor returned to play at just the right time. I mixed them in with surprise stud RB from the Browns, Jerome Ford–go, Browns, go!

Sure, my man Eagles quarterback Jalen Hurts had his struggles on the gridiron, but in fantasy world, he’s money (#2 ranked QB). Eagles kicker Jake Elliot did his job all season, as did the Kansas City defense and 49ers tight end George Kittle.

I picked up Packers rookie wide receiver Jayden Reed: Who knew he’d be so good? AI didn’t figure on my not only grabbing Steelers WR George Pickens but that he would blow it up in the final two games, including our championship, just when my normal starter Dolphins WR Jaylen Waddle was injured.

In that lopsided Super Bowl win against my brother-in-law–two old guys vindicated–I played six of nine players I drafted. I stuck to my guns. I looked like a genius!

Well, I’m not, but the AI certainly wasn’t either.

If AI can’t predict a silly thing like fantasy football, maybe natural language generators using predictive modeling for word choice aren’t quite there in capturing creativity the way a human does in choosing a sussever (my made-up word for “unique sequence of two words”).

I’m no Shakespeare, the great coiner of words, so “sussever” dies here, but humans will keep cementing words into the dictionary like we did again in 2023 and coming up with new ideas, and AI apps will comb their databases to catch up.

Maybe some day, AI. For now, I lord my championship over all. They were supposed to be better than me. Will I repeat next year? You have as good a chance as anyone or anything of figuring that one out.

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Scott Warnock

Scott Warnock is a writer and teacher who lives in South Jersey. He is a professor of English at Drexel University, where he is also the Associate Dean of Undergraduate Education in the College of Arts and Sciences. Father of three and husband of one, Scott is president of a local high school education foundation and spent many years coaching youth sports.