Empty nest? We barely got to snap a twig

Empty nest? We barely got to snap a twig

Posted on June 7th, 2023 by Scott Warnock

Eight months as empty nesters. How was it? We’ve barely had time to branch out.

Because, and this is a little hawkward, but recently I received the starling information that our goose was cooked. With Junco-ming right around the corner, my nephew is moving from Indiana to good old NJay.

He’s alighting into that empty nest. When I first heard this news, I was like, “Is this fake, oriole?” I should’ve dove for cover, but I couldn’t duck: He was robin me of this time of my life! (And I kinda wondered if my sister-in-law was pulling the old mama bird cuckoo trick on us…) I suppose I could rail to Acanthis, grouse about it all I want …

… but w-hen I thought it over, I was like, you know, who’myna to complain? After all, he’s no turkey. He’s a good kid, and I feel we’re gonna be lucky to have him. My own kids might be a little bittern, a little thrush with jealousy, but he could become number one.

So we’ve warmed up to the idea of this guy flying into our roost. He’s a smart, talon-ted kid. He often grackles me up. He likes to talk, so he’ll keep me sharp with some nice chats, and I’m sure his “fascinating” stories will keep me rapt. Believe it or not, it will be nice to have a tanager in the house again. (We will have to get used to aerie-ting out the smell of those soccer cleats again (those things can get pretty fowl!).)

I would vulture to guess that he’ll probably help my diet too beak-ause he eats like a you know what with his salads and cucumbers–it’s owl down the nuthatch. He’ll provide another regular attendee at family-friend game nights, helping passerine the Balderdash box around the table.

Well, let osprey it goes well, but, still, is it a cardinal sin to look at this a little wistfully? It seems my time of rattling around the old house warbling away will be delayed, although the wait may make the time when I do become a loony old coot all the sweeter.

I’ll echo what Joe says to Pip in Great Eggpectations: “What larks!” are ahead of us! Even if he doesn’t pay any wren, overall, I’m sure the eggperience will be, you know, eggcellent.

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Scott Warnock

Scott Warnock is a writer and teacher who lives in South Jersey. He is a professor of English at Drexel University, where he is also the Associate Dean of Undergraduate Education in the College of Arts and Sciences. Father of three and husband of one, Scott is president of a local high school education foundation and spent many years coaching youth sports.