A “dad outfit” deserves a “dad question”

A “dad outfit” deserves a “dad question”

Posted on September 12th, 2022 by Scott Warnock

Let me start by saying that if my youngest puts as much study time into school as he put into researching a new computer–credit to the boy, he used Mom’s computer during high school without a complaint–he’s going to do well. I was amazed at the amount of effort he put into it.

Of course, all this investigation took place online. At one point, I said, “Hey, do you want to put your hands on something? Let’s take a ride to Best Buy.” He agreed, and off we went.

I admit that I was, uh, not dressed all that sharp. I was in a hurry. I had on longish, droopy khaki shorts with no belt, an oversized white t-shirt that was tucked in here and there, and my [new] black sneakers. As we walked in the store, he looked me up and down and said, “You are dressed like such a dad!”

We started looking at computers, and because my wife wasn’t involved, neither of us had the sense to check closing time, which was in 10 minutes. We did get a lot done in that 10 minutes, thanks to a helpful Best Buy dude. We checked out several laptops, and my son developed a clearer sense of what he wanted.

We were about to walk out, but, oh no, I wasn’t done. I waited until our dude came back around, cleaning things up for the night.

I gestured to him from an aisle away and said, “Hey, can I ask you one more question?

“Sure,” he said, walking over to us.

My son gave me a puzzled look, and I wagged my thumb hitchhiker-like toward one of the computers and asked, “Do, er, these things, er, help you connect to the Interweb?” Every part of the dude’s face started shrinking toward its center–he was bemused. Then my son and I burst out laughing, and the dude caught on, laughed and shook his head and walked away.

As we walked out of the store, and my son started punching me: “I can’t believe you asked him that!”

We chuckled all the way to our car, and when I hopped in, I said something like, “Insult my outfit, that’s what you get.”

I can’t wait to meet his new pals from college.

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Scott Warnock

Scott Warnock is a writer and teacher who lives in South Jersey. He is a professor of English at Drexel University, where he is also the Associate Dean of Undergraduate Education in the College of Arts and Sciences. Father of three and husband of one, Scott is president of a local high school education foundation and spent many years coaching youth sports.