On Sunday, TLC ran two Christmas-themed episodes of the program “Sister Wives,” which follows the polygamist Brown family. The episodes were filmed four months after the Browns “came out,” and were being investigated by the Lehigh County sheriff’s department. It was this investigation that led to the Browns leaving Utah for Nevada, which is presumably less intolerant of polygamy, at least reality television polygamy.

Intercut with a montage of the numerous Brown children dressing their Christmas tree (at a treacherously placed cabin the middle of a forbidding area of snow-covered Utah), father Kody Brown tearfully explains that families convicted of committing the “crime” of polygamy are broken up. Third wife Christine tells us that her grandparents were jailed for polygamy, with the wives separated and children sent off to various foster families, with all contact broken off.

It was about as moving a scene as you can expect from a reality show, but imagine if the Browns lived in Broward County? [Read more →]

Tags: on the law, television by Ricky Sprague
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There are those who say that there are those who say that blogging is dying out. I put it this way, because I have never read an article explaining what, exactly, is meant by this, but the impression I get is that people think Twitter and the quicker (and, in my opinion, more anemic) forms of Internet communication are stealing all of the intellectual traffic from the good, old-fashioned (hey, it only takes a couple of months these days) blog. But the reason I can’t accept this is because I don’t know what the hell a blog is. Do you? [Read more →]

Tags: artistic unknowns by Chris Matarazzo, books & writing by Chris Matarazzo
6 Comments »

The former Speaker of the House and longtime Georgia celebritician Newt Gingrich has announced that he will run for the Presidency in ’12. Well, he hasn’t actually announced it, he has announced that he will announce it in a few days. This is classic Gingrich, for those too fortunate to remember much about Bill Clinton’s famous antagonist. Even long out of office he routinely conducts himself as if he had the media footprint of Justin Bieber, or back in da day, Clinton himself. Newt is always certain that we have been waiting for word from him, on our politics and economics or on his plans for either a new novel or a national campaign. Once he has his tie snugged up, then we may all begin. And he certainly has some claim to a swelled opinion of his own importance. He is (as his suspiciously friendly wiki reflects) a college professor, author and historian which does at least set him apart from other Legislators who are almost 100% attorneys. [Read more →]

Tags: money, politics & government by Ken Watson
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Another Mother’s Day has come and gone. While I’m sure the mothers appreciated the recognition, it’s back to reality today. Let’s face it — the flowers are wilting, the homemade card is in the trash, and the huevos rancheros from brunch didn’t really agree with mom’s touchy stomach. Now, we’re back to doing what we do best: criticizing our mothers.

When it comes to family, mothers get the absolute worst part of the deal. They give their blood, sweat, tears, sanity, personal hygiene, friends, hobbies (just to name a few) for the sake of their kids, and then get blamed for everything. It’s the natural order of things; your mommy is responsible for a few of the good things and all of the bad things that happen to you. Ask any therapist and she’ll tell you the truth — if it’s not one thing, it’s your mother. [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting by Nancy DeGregorio
3 Comments »

Ladies and gentlemen, this week’s blog comes to you from a tired, unshaven, physically exhausted, and drowsy Marty O’Connor. Exactly like every Monday after a weekend in my 20’s. Except instead of partying and carrying on, I had my three year old son Jack, aka “The Jackal”, all weekend by myself as Cailin was up in Vermont participating in a race. I had a weekend full of running after Jack, entertaining Jack, not getting much sleep because of Jack, and trying to clean a house that is home to a three year old blond tornado named Jack. [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, Marty digs by Marty O'Connor
5 Comments »

After several years in which bigger and bigger penalties were being handed out for a variety of infractions, NASCAR decided that they were going to be a looser bunch in 2011. The sport’s governing body stated that it would allow the drivers to essentially police themselves, hoping that things would be kept under control without NASCAR having to play the heavy all the time. It is pretty clear to me that this new philosophy is not working. I know the crowds go crazy when they see one driver go after another, but it is totally unacceptable, from my perspective, and someone is going to get killed if it’s not brought under control. [Read more →]

Tags: bad sports, good sports by Alan Spoll
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10. Instead of 72 virgins, he was greeted by 12 goats

9. Hell’s only movie theater is showing The Love Guru on a continuous loop

8. The constant whine of smoke alarms really gets on your nerves

7. The road there was actually paved with bad intentions

6. Evidently, none of the suicide bombers made it to Heaven

5. Hitler knows some great ethnic jokes

4. While it’s unbearably hot, there’s no humidity!

3. Hell TV airs nothing but reality shows 24–7

2. They’re expecting a cold snap if Sarah Palin gets elected President

1. It turns out “the Great Satan” isn’t the United States after all

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

Tags: Bob Sullivan's top ten everything, ends & odd, religion & philosophy by Bob Sullivan
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In less than a month, we will observe the birthday of Sir Edward William Elgar, 1st Baronet, OM, GCVO and Master of the King’s Musick, who was born June 2, 1857. I rather like how it happens that his birthday coincides with that time of year when one of his works, Pomp and Circumstance March #1 (“Land of Hope and Glory”) has been heard so much, in so many places.
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Tags: education by Jeff McDonald
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The first rule of timetravel is don’t touch anything, not so it would show, anyhow. Sure strangling the infant Hitler would be fun and make for some great souvenirs but your dream vacation will raise a Super-Hitler who does NOT helpfully off himself in the storeroom. Therefore when you return, things will be different; horrendously different if The Twilight Zone has taught us anything. You yourself may just go pop! like a soap bubble or if you haven’t kept your parents from meeting you will find other disappointments; Hansen was a boy band. You just said, no. And that night when you realized in the nick of time? Sorry, now it was a bit too late.

Timetravel, like salt and cooking oil, is hazardous, so must be used sparingly and responsibly. Like these commodities it should be and is controlled by the federal government. [Read more →]

Tags: politics & government, trusted media & news by Ken Watson
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Walter Cronkite was a towering figure of the media for many decades. His catchphrase was in his sign-off. And that’s the way it was on whatever date. It is somewhat curious that he seems to be addressing archivists of the future rather than his live viewers of the evening but there you have it. He declared the first draft of the day’s history done and in the can. A not-young Dan Rather was groomed to replace him and no doubt he took it seriously, especially as the years passed and Cronkite proved remarkably durable both in his ability to show up and read the news and his prominence in the public mind. Rather was certainly prominent himself, anchoring every electi0n and hurricane. He became known for folksy, cryptic aphorisms supposedly drawn from his Texas youth. If a frog had side pockets he would carry a handgun. That sort of thing. Once Cronkite did actually relinquish his chair Dan searched for some time for his own tagline. One experiment was a single, solemnly intoned word. Courage.

Whether he was observing Courage, practicing Courage or pleading for Courage was never clear. And while that might have been appropriate for a newscast absorbed with war, famine or plague it didn’t quite fit when the last story of the night was a human interest fluff piece about a skydiving shar pei or somesuch. Courage, Wrinkles. Courage. [Read more →]

Tags: politics & government, trusted media & news by Ken Watson
3 Comments »

Tags: politics & government, terror & war by Alexander Thorburn Hoffman
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Maybe I’m just a linguistic sponge, but I find myself falling into the discourse of those around me. A northeastern boy, I’ve felt that if I moved to say, the south, that I’d pick up not only the vernacular but the accent within weeks.

This brings me to adverbs. [Read more →]

Tags: language & grammar, virtual children by Scott Warnock by Scott Warnock
8 Comments »

Ah, Obama, our muddle-headed philosopher-king. He strains valiantly, but he is deeply confused by the rupture between dream and reality. Take all that stuff about closing down Guantanamo, ending extraordinary rendition and so on. He meant it at the time, I’m sure, but never having had a real job or been responsible for much, he just didn’t understand how the world works. So later, he had to back down, and admit, confusingly, that all that Bush stuff he once hated was kinda cool after all. Or at least unavoidable.

Then there is his bizarre foreign policy which largely consists of pissing off allies and sucking up to enemies. Consider Iran (our enemy) for instance — riots for democracy over there and it took him over a week to say anything much, and it wasn’t much, and was loaded with unctuous references to the Supreme Leader. Consider Egypt (our ally) on the other hand — riots for democracy and it was: Mubarak go now, followed by — well maybe not now, followed by — oh alright then, if you have to.

See how confusing that is? [Read more →]

Tags: terror & war, trusted media & news by Daniel Kalder
4 Comments »

The 2012 election cycle kicks-off tonight with the first Republican presidential primary debate–an event that will surely be one in a long line of platitude-a-paloosas to come from all parties and all office seekers–so I want to make a prediction. Given the recent success of the Navy SEAL operation that killed Osama, and that the unofficial motto of the SEALs is reportedly  “Failure is not an option,” we’re going to be hearing this particular phrase a lot in the coming months in reference to the need for government action to solve our country’s ills, both real and imagined.

The meaning, of course, of this particular platitude is latent, and lies deep within the ideology of the speaker. So, as a service to the reader of When Falls The Coliseum, I present this handy list of latent meanings:

Republican: Failure is not an option…but if you fail, it’s your fault.
Democrat: Failure is not an option…but if you fail, it’s NOT your fault.
Libertarian: Failure is not an option…but it ought to be.
Constitutionalist: Failure is not an option…it’s a right.
Green: Failure is not an option…it’s a tree falling in the woods with no one to hear.
Socialist: Failure is not an option…it’s a utopia.

Tags: politics & government by Jay Baldwin
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White House silent. Does it sound silent to you? What the Posties mean is that the Administration has gone silent on the facts. Can you blame them? Even that sizeable crowd willing or even enthusiastic to believe every exhalation from the West Wing have knocked their heads on a very hard glass ceiling. Without a dedicated T-1 line an interested patriot has no hope of keeping up with just the official revisions, much less the larger media response, regarding the public secret of Osama bin Laden’s last minutes and final resting place. The nation at large trots along gamely, then sprints trying to catch the flying missives pouring out of the Obama motorcade. But the fastest dog has no hope of biting that bumper. A kind driver will immediately speed up and leave the barking mutts quickly in the dust. The vindictive type will troll along at the pooch’s top speed for a few minutes before proceeding onto their business. Which has occurred? [Read more →]

Tags: terror & war, trusted media & news by Ken Watson
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A Tiger in the Kitchen made me hungry. Really hungry. I love Asian food of all sorts, and listening to author Cheryl Lu-Lien Tan describe these family favorites in such loving detail made me want to try to make them myself, because I just knew takeout was going to be a disappointment. Dumplings, soups and special desserts, often tied to holiday celebrations and memories of family dinners, are all on the menu in her book, subtitled “A Memoir of Food and Family.” Her attempts to reconnect with her family and childhood through not just recipes but the act of preparing them, will be achingly familiar to many readers. [Read more →]

Tags: books & writing, Lisa Reads by Lisa Hura
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Let’s say that Barack Obama dons some gay apparel, something like a viking hat and chainmail, hoists Osama’s crab-nibbled melon over his own and runs out on the West Lawn crying out like Braveheart, “Freedom! Freedom! Freedom!” This has a predictable effect, rallying the entire country to the cause of Scottish nationalism, but also whatever other plans the President has cribbed on his ipad. The hottentots in the House and elsewhere fall in to line. The institutions of international finance are also well impressed by this display of leading from the side yard; they promise (and prove to have the ability) to buy up all the T-bills we can print at around 3%. For the most part there is no effect on the media, except that Fox is given over to the closest thing white people have to Obama, Mitt Romney, making it as tractable as a gelded pony. The Bush Era Tax Rates die of natural causes next year, engorging federal revenues while not harming economic activity in the least. Likewise FICA taxes rise to no complaints or ill effect. The regulations of the insurance industry have exactly the intended effect and no other leaving it exactly as prosperous and powerful as Obama wants. In short, let us make this titanic and diverse stipulation that is far, far better than any reasonable Best Case Scenario and still we can confidently predict that Obamacare (or whatever you would like to name it…. Husseincare? How’s that sound?) will fail utterly, catastrophically and grotesquely. And we can blame it on Charlie Sheen. [Read more →]

Tags: health & medical, politics & government by Ken Watson
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Saying that President Obama doesn’t deserve credit because he didn’t fire the shot that took him out is like saying bin Laden is not responsible for 9/11 because he didn’t fly the planes. [Read more →]

Tags: politics & government, terror & war by Jody Lane
13 Comments »

Within the last 2 years, President Obama told CIA director Leon Panetta to make the search and capture of Bin Laden the top priority in Afghanistan. As impractical and zealous as that might have seemed, it just feels right today. Bin Laden might not have been the logistical or intellectual force within Al-Qaeda at the time of his death that he was before, but he was certainly a symbolic and inspirational force. And as the lush compound that provided him refuge shows, he might still have been a financial force too.
[Read more →]

Tags: politics & government, terror & war by Robert O'Hara
3 Comments »

America breathes a sigh of relief. In far off Pakistan US forces have finally caught up with the world’s most wanted man, Ossama bin Laden. It is a benchmark in the McCain Presidency that even many supporters now believe is half over.

Spontaneous celebrations in Times Square and elsewhere were a shot in the arm for the Administration that has seemed unable to put a foot right lately. Mired as the nation is in a new war in Libya and a lesser action in Syria dubbed a “forceful resoration of order” by some anonymous and perhaps now unemployed McCain flack, the response was heartfelt. In front of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave, John Sidney McCain took the photograph that will certainly define his career if not his lifetime, mingling with boisterous crowds at midnight, casually dressed, and draped in flags by the crowds to the consternation of the Secret Service. [Read more →]

Tags: politics & government, terror & war by Ken Watson
1 Comment »