Cut the crap, Charlie Sheen
I am sick as a dog, dear readers. How sick is she? She is sicker than a consumptive waif in a Bronte novel. She is so sick that her eyes, burning with fever, can barely see the screen upon which she types her weekly words of wisdom. She is so sick, in fact, that she will have to keep her advice very short this week. Charlie Sheen, this one’s for you: Get it. The hell. Together.
I mean seriously, dude. Picking up a porn star and trashing a suite at the Plaza? Who are you, Leonardo DiCaprio circa 1999? Blaming your behavior on an allergic reaction to medication? Who are you, Meg Boyle? (For the last time, I was on Advil Sinus Headache and it was an honest mistake!) Claiming your antics were just another “bad night“? I don’t even have a snarky comparison to make on that point; that’s all you, Charlie, and it’s a new low.
If my admonition isn’t enough to shame you into getting it together (and it should be, as I can be pretty scary when I’m sick and annoyed), consider this: Tom Sizemore is urging you to get help. Tom Sizemore. Type “hitting rock bottom” into Wikipedia and the definition will simply read: “You have hit rock bottom when Tom Sizemore encourages you to get help.” So listen up, Carlos Irwin Estévez, because I only have a minute to spare before I pass out from dehydration: Enough of this crap. Get your act together, dammit. And take your Vitamin C; there’s a nasty bug going around.
Let’s face it: Some celebrities could use good advice. Meg Boyle gives it to them every Tuesday.
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What? Nothing about Mr. Sheen’s watch? :-)
Seriously, though … a well-deserved shot across his bow. Well-done.
Meg,
In the interest of fairness, I should point out that he has never missed a days work. According to cast interviews and several PA friends of mine who have worked at Warner Bros. Studios, he shows up on time, knows his lines and nails it every time.
That said, Yes. Get it the fuck together Charlie.
-K
‘Nasty bug going around’…..surely you’re not referring to his HIV positive status and HIV medication?
Surely not, as this was written in 2010.