Republican Senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina is upset about the introduction of an immigration bill on the Senate floor. Not because the senator — who’s been affectionately called “Grahamnesty” by his admirers — is against immigration reform. No, he’s angry, he says, because introducing the immigration bill will disrupt deliberation of the energy bill he also planned to introduce.

You see, apparently Senate dudes are unable to do two things at once. Unless, of course, one of those things happens to be war making. Or earmarking.

As a compromise, the Senate is considering merging the two pieces of legislation, by applying the cap-and-trade concept to both carbon emissions and illegal immigration.

The immigration component will work like this: the INS’ll set a cap on the number of illegal immigrants residing in the country at any given time. And then issue permits to companies, allowing them to retain a certain number of illegals. Any company needing illegals beyond their allotment will have to buy them from companies that have some to spare.

Like carbon, these “people” will become a commodity traded on the open market, possibly reminding some of the markets that operated in the South years ago. But, of course, this market will be completely different. Here buyers won’t check the teeth and gums of the goods in question. Those records will be stored in a computer.

Not surprisingly, immigrant skeptics in Congress are insisting that this solution is in conflict with the 13th Amendment; the one that kinda bans slavery. But, in truth, many congressional bills, including the climate one, flouts the Constitution.

One more won’t make a bit of difference.

Equally unsurprising, even proponents of cap-and-trade admit that this system might not have a big effect on illegal immigration.

Or any effect.

But emission trading systems aren’t having any effect in Europe, and that’s not stopping Congress from trying to implement them here.

Nor should it. For “cap-and-trade” has a cool sounding name — catchy even, much like “shock-and-awe.” Only this one also has a freemarkety feel to it, making it doubleplusgood.

And even if cap-and-trade accomplishes nothing, it’s still has worth, as it shows that Congress is at least doing something.

Even if it is only doing it one thing at a time.

Tweet  Print This Post

Tags: politics & government // 1 Comment »