Dramatis Personae
Terry O’Neill, President of NOW
Rahm Emanuel, White House Chief of Staff

O’NEILL: Hello. We in the pro-choice community feel — in light of Pam and Tim Tebow’s horrific and offensive Super Bowl ad, where they ignorantly glorify the choice of life — that we must respond, by encouraging all pregnant women in crisis to make the one and only correct choice.

EMANUEL: Death.

O’NEILL: While it’s true that children born under difficult circumstances can grow up to become a star quarterback or even the president of the United States, they can just as likely grow up to be Glenn Beck. Or some teabagger.

EMANUEL: And just think, if Pam Tebow had made the right choice, Florida just might’ve prevailed in the SEC Championship game.

O’NEILL: So, if you’re expecting a baby in a less than ideal situation, please do the responsible thing and kill it. Especially if you’re a Republican.

EMANUEL: Or a f—— retard.

O’NEILL: Now, back to the game.

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