November 7, 2009
I dream a salesman in a men’s store informs me that I am dressing incorrectly and if I only bought the right suit I would look sensational. He hands me a suit to try on and it does not look as if it would fit me. I squeeze into it, however, and while it feels funny I look in the mirror and I am fabulous. I comb out my scraggly hair as well and it turns out to be shoulder length and silky. I look wonderful and feel positive about myself.

November 6, 2009
I dream my brother and I are working at a carnival. He has invented a device made of cardboard boxes that will make bald people appear to have hair, and he figures he’ll clean up. I work at a “drama” concession. We act out scenarios for wronged women who have been impregnated by military men. I play the role of a contrite GI, and my job is to look into the wronged woman’s eyes, get down on one knee, and tell her I want to marry her and be with her forever. I do this with great sincerity.

June 21, 1999
I dream I need a haircut, so I go down the block to a little boy. I sit on his front stoop and wait for him to cut my hair. His assistant, a little girl, comes out and starts making random snips, which makes me nervous. Then, the little boy comes out and doesn’t do much better. Finally, the boy’s father comes home and agrees to straighten out my hair. When it comes time to cut, however, he delegates the job to his wife.

“Fred’s Dreams” appears every Wednesday.

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