OK, OK, it was bad enough when William Penn was acting alone. But now he’s got Mother Nature chiming in on his evil scheme to deny the Phillies a World Championship. Evidently not impressed with the tiny pewter statue of himself placed by iron workers on the uppermost beam of the Comcast Center so that MISTER BIG SHOT could be once again the “tallest” person in Philadelphia, William Penn did a shout out to Mother Nature to have her rain on the Phillies’ parade.

Mere mortals — or at least non-Philadelphians — may not understand that William Penn has placed a curse — and he calls himself a QUAKER! — on Philadelphia major league sports teams because, you know, we built a building taller than William Penn’s hat on his statue atop City Hall. No Philadelphia major league professional sports team (sorry, Soul, Kixx, Wings) has won a championship since One Liberty Place surpassed the height of William Penn’s hat (548 feet) in 1987. The last Philly team to win the big one was the Doctor J Sixers in 1983.

So Philadelphia union construction workers try to appease the “ego” of William Penn by installing a talisman on top of the highest girder almost 1,000 feet above the ground and what does “His friendliness” do? He calls in his chits with Mamma Natural and has this monsoon wipe out the Phillies’ winning moment.

I got news for you Mister Big Hat. The Phillies will rise above your curse. The Fightin’s will find a way to wake the quake, whack the hat, send the Friend. . . And afterwards we will dance in front of your statue. Because that’s what we do.

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