I believe Obama is our best bet as president. I’m not a Democrat. I’m not even a liberal. I’m an independent. A mugwump, in the only important sense of the word:

 

Matt Stone, a co-creator of South Park, summed it all up for me: “I hate conservatives, but I really fucking hate liberals.” And yet I’m voting for Obama. I even held my nose and declared myself a Democrat for one day to vote for him in the primaries. New Jersey went to Hillary anyway, but hey, I did what I could.

This is why I’m voting for Obama: none of the candidates running in either primary were qualified to lead anyone anywhere. None of their experiences, even when combined, amount to anything resembling what I’m looking for in a president. I think my tax adviser would make the best president, but he’s too smart to take a pay cut in exchange for a million times the tsuris.

I don’t think any of the candidates would keep too many of their promises, which constitute threats to the other half of the voters. I agree that “change” is just a pretty catchword, and none of them will get to implement too many of their bright ideas, which all sound good as a sound bite but most will not bear scrutiny of cold, hard logistics.

McCain’s experience of being stuck in a box for five years does not make him a competent commander-in-chief who could also handle major bank collapses. Hillary’s experience as a beleaguered first lady and a co-president wannabe did not give her the necessary people skills to handle delicate diplomatic situations, nor is her “35 years of experience” anything but a myth repeated often enough and shrilly enough. (Yes, I’m still counting Hillary as a candidate in running. I’ll stop after Obama is sworn in and has made his appointments and she’s nowhere in line to become president even if everyone standing in her way to the Oval Office mysteriously dies or commits suicide.) Biden can’t get anyone to listen to him for more than a minute at a time. Palin has demonstrated no qualifications even worth tearing down. Obama — well, Palin is right, actually: the world is not a community and it doesn’t need an organizer.

What Obama is, is an excellent brand. There’s not much substance behind it, but the brand name Barack Obama evokes an easy, open smile and endless goodwill. Where any other politician would be (and has been) accused of flip-flopping and pandering, Obama succeeds in coming across as open-minded and willing to revise his opinions in view of new information, rather than being rigid and stubborn. Instead of saber-rattling and woofing about our enemies (who, as Hillary would have it, include the Republicans), he seems to be genuinely willing to help everybody get along. He’s tall, sophisticated, and photogenic, and his family is adorable. He’s also the only one likely to make some bipartisan appointments based on job requirements rather than pound away at the opposing party as the enemy.

Our current standing in the world is very low — and even as somebody who has always believed that the “world’s opinion” should matter less to us than our own, American needs and interests, I can’t help but notice how that translates into the equally low value of the dollar. Out of all our current options (and yes, I’m still counting Hillary), Obama is the best face we have to present to the world. The Obama Brand: friendly, well-spoken, well-meaning, willing to hear everybody out, willing to get along with everyone. It’s the best PR we can get. And, right now, we can use some good PR.

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