I’ve mentioned Lenore Skenazy once or twice before in my column. She’s an author, a columnist, a blogger and a mom who let her kid ride the subway by himself at the age of 9. Quick! Everybody gasp in horror. Her website Free-Range Kids is a must read/browse/love/hate – whatever – if you’re a parent, you have to check it out. Parents today are so afraid of losing their children at the park, the mall, whatever — that they’ve taken to literally attaching tracking devices to their children’s feet. Sensational Beginnings even makes it look cute and fuzzy so the kids will go for it.

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Tags: family & parenting, going parental by Jaclyn Roth
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Yup. You read it correctly. Some wasted asshole actually put his baby in an oven and left him there overnight. Talk about giving new meaning to the phrase “bun in the oven.” Congratulations, Larry Long — you are officially our daddy douche of the week. [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, going parental, on the law by Jaclyn Roth
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As you’re sitting in your office/cubicle right now, I am in Orlando, Florida — traipsing around Disney World trying to find Ariel in her stupid Grotto. What the hell is a Grotto, anyway? I had to google that shit so when I actually arrived on the “Disney Campus,” I sounded like I knew what I was talking about when I asked where to find that red-headed bimbo. I actually Wikipedia’d that shit so a bunch of wanna-be actors in costumes with over-sized craniums wouldn’t think that I  was an idiot. So sad.

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Tags: family & parenting, going parental, travel & foreign lands by Jaclyn Roth
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Is it me, or were snow days way more fun when we were kids? Now? Not so much.

I remember being a kid, growing up in Rockland County, NY — ya know, the place that gets all the snow the city hears about. We averaged 6 inches every time it snowed, at least — and that was nothing. I remember waking up at 6 in the morning on snow days — earlier than I ever  woke up, including these days — just to turn on RKO radio — the AM station every kid gathered around the radio to listen to, fingers crossed, praying to hear their school’s name called out during the list of cancellations. Man, those were the days. Nothing beat a snow day… as a kid. As a parent? Fuck. That. Shit. [Read more →]

Tags: environment & nature, family & parenting, going parental by Jaclyn Roth
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I generally tend to go off in my blogs. I love picking on parents, their kids and all the stupid things they do both together and on their own. I guess I just have a knack for being obnoxious and judgmental — even though ironically, up until I had a kid, I didn’t think I was remotely judgmental. Now? Pshht. I totally am. It’s impossible not to be when it comes to parenting. It’s like the minute you squeeze out that kid, you start looking around at other people and their kids and think to yourself, “I can’t believe that mother is letting her son stand on top of the monkey bars. What a reckless moron.” It just happens. Just like your boobs become all engorged with milk whether you’re going to breast feed or not — the minute you have a kid, you instantly start thinking everyone else around you is doing something wrong. [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, going parental by Jaclyn Roth
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Apparently, early childhood testing is becoming more and more common. This article in New York Magazine is a must read for anyone with children. Whether you plan on enrolling your kids in private school or not, it’s an incredibly insightful and interesting look inside the world of testing children at a young age and the implications of allowing those tests to further determine the future of these kids. [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, going parental by Jaclyn Roth
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What? That’s not normal? Apparently, to Lynn Middlebrooks Geter, it is. She forced her son to kill his hamster as punishment for receiving poor grades in school. What happened to time outs? Or no Play Station for a week? Kill your hamster? Really? I wonder at what point Lynn’s head imploded and she thought to herself, “I know. I’ll make the little bastard kill his hamster with a hammer. That’ll teach him to fail social studies!” [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, going parental by Jaclyn Roth
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What kind of a parent does their kids’ homework for them? Like, actually does it for them, not helps. It seems to be an ongoing struggle for parents these days. I read an interesting piece by Sue Shellenbarger on The Juggle last week. I guess it’s kind of like this whole Keeping Up with the Steins mentality. Parents want their children to succeed, and heaven forbid they aren’t holding their own against their peers. So one parent starts and another gets wind of it and before you know it, you’ve got a bunch of 40-year-olds sitting at the kitchen table with rubber cement, a shoe box, modeling clay and construction paper — while their kids are in the den playing Grand Theft Auto on PS3. Yeah. That’ll get ‘em into college. [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, going parental by Jaclyn Roth
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Up until a few weeks ago we had a Safety 1st Grip ‘n Twist Door Knob Cover on my 3-year-old’s doorknob so she couldn’t get out of her room at night. For me, it was the fear of her roaming around our apartment in the middle of the night and hurting herself, opening the front door, finding her way to the knife drawer — normal things we parents worry about — that led me to put it on her door. Once we put her in a bed, the thought of her having free rein in our apartment caused me complete anxiety. I’m Jewish, what do you want from me? [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, going parental by Jaclyn Roth
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I wrote a blog last year that centered around growing up as a Jewish kid during Christmas and how to now handle my daughter during this time of year. You can read it here. I used to think it was pretty funny; I kept it light and to the point. But now I don’t think it’s that funny. I’ve been finding people’s assumption that saying “Merry Christmas” to everyone is totally normal and acceptable to be pretty fucking presumptuous and rude. [Read more →]

Tags: family & parenting, going parental by Jaclyn Roth
7 Comments »