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Ten good albums from 2009

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When I’m not railing against Israel or otherwise decrying imperialism, sometimes I like to write about music on my blog, Dogs Thought. I’ve combined here a two-part post I published there listing, in no particular order, ten albums I liked from this past year. WFTC does not have as much content about current music as current movies or TV, so I figured it couldn’t hurt to throw in my two cents on the various tra-la-las and boom-boom-baps that emerged from stereos, headphones, tin cans, etc. in 2009. Enjoy. [Read more →]

Marriages of inconvenience

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With the year and season turning; perhaps also the decade and undoubtably the aging of the millenium that seemed so young moments ago, Americans high and low, both bailed and swamped are reflecting on their lives, their faith, the state of the world and the state of their relationships. Many find themselves feeling trapped in arrangements they made joyously and optimistically; wedded in haste and in public, they now regret at length and in the dark privacy of their hearts. Not exempted from this is the enthusiastic practitioner of plural, whimsical marriages, our fine and debonair President, Barack Obama. [Read more →]

Obama gets an F

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A commander-in-chief’s first and foremost duty and responsibility is protecting American citizens. Obama gave a speech and announced that a terrorist’s ability to board an American airliner with explosives in his underwear was a “systemic failure.”

But as Toby Harnden, the U.S. editor of the British Daily Telegraph noted in his column , Obama is in charge of that system.

I agree with Harnden that Obama gets an F for national security.

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New Year’s Eve rumors: dispelled!

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New Year’s Eve is one of America’s greatest traditions. And, as is true of all great American traditions, New Year’s Eve brings with it a new set of scary rumors each year. Will the world come to an end? Will all the dogs start talking and turn out to be very mean? Y2K? Maybe!

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A self-centered list for a self-centered decade!

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(N.B.: Tongue is firmly planted in cheek throughout. Expect offense in response to one of the more offensive decades in recent memory.)

It’s that time of the decade again. The toll of tonight’s midnight church bells or the image of that big-ass crystal ball slowly descending into the madness of Times Square will signal that we’ve let another decade slip away. The…um…“naughts” have been a decade like no other, so I’d like to take an opportunity to honor this decade in what seems the only way possible: with an egocentric list.

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Do we pay TSA officers enough?

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One question I have concerning full body scans at airports, and the threats they pose to personal liberties, travelers’ dignity, yada-yada-yada … what about the poor schmucks who will have to look at way-too-many images of way-too-many travelers such as myself?
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Top 10 years of the decade

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10. 2001
9. 2000
8. 2005
7. 2003
6. 2008
5. 2002
4. 2009
3. 2006
2. 2004
1. 2007

(Personal reasons.)

The top fifty states of the decade

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It’s the end of 2009 and the end of the single digit years in the 2000s. When this time of year rolls around we get bombarded with “the year in review” or the “decade in review” or the “top ten bakeries of the year,” etc. Now, I’m not opposed to lists. In fact, I spend a lot of time discussing and refining my own mental lists of the best things. Movies, bands, comics… I’m not sure why I do it. I suppose I want to definitively know, through aggressive research and discussion, what the best anything is. That way when some dude comes up and says P.S. I Love You is the greatest movie of all time, I can walk him through my list and he can see that maybe it’s just a little lower than he thought.

But what about the last decade? Not something of all time but just the last decade? Sort of narrow the scope a bit. Separate the wheat from the chaff. Let the cream rise to the top, ya know? As I’m deployed to Africa, presumably defending the United States, I figured why not rank the 50 states over the last decade. I’m willing to die for these states and they should know what order they are in. [Read more →]

Advice for young people

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Of course what children really want for Christmas is a list of commands, prohibitions, and threats. To this end I have compiled the following words of advice for young people. This is the wisdom I have painfully accrued over 33 years of stupidity, and I do not hesitate to pass it on to the next generation. [Read more →]

Toughs

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October 30, 2009
I dream I am waiting for a party to begin and I am sitting on the curb outside practicing a magic trick in which four popcorn kernels magically leave my left hand and reappear in my right. A young tough comes by and ridicules and insults me. I don’t like the ridicule and insult, but I am more upset that he does not want to see this beautiful magic trick. I try to explain this, but he insults me more and throws my popcorn kernels and punches me. I am concerned for my well-being, but I am still upset about the magic trick.

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