Entries Tagged as 'trusted media & news'

Bob Sullivan's top ten everythingtrusted media & news

Now that it has decided to jettison its classic slogan, top ten suggested new slogans for Fox News

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10. “Nobody Fox with the Truth Better than We Do”

9. “Ruining America Since 1996!”

8. “At Fox News, ‘Harass’ Is Two Words”

7. “Proving You Can Be Right and Wrong at the Same Time”

6. “Where Journalism Goes to Die”

5. “Deutschland Über Ailes”

4. “You Can’t Handle the Truth!!”

3. “The Inside Poop, Straight from the Horse’s Ass”

2. “For Fox Sake!”

1. “Unfair and, Especially, Unbalanced”

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

diatribestrusted media & news

The REAL “West Texas Investors Club”

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Up until now, I’ve resisted the temptation to comment on “reality television” … but now that genre has hit a little too close to home – quite literally – for me, and I find myself compelled to rear-up on my hind legs, step-up to the keyboard, and put in ‘my two cents.’ [Read more →]

Bob Sullivan's top ten everythingtrusted media & news

Bill O’Reilly’s top ten excuses for his embellishments over the years

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10. “I did nothing wrong, just ask my good friend, Brian Williams.”

9. “I co-wrote Killing Jesus, so I’m sure any sins I may have committed are now forgiven.”

8. “I may have repeatedly claimed I was a war correspondent during the Falklands War, even though the closest I got to the Falkland Islands was Buenos Aires, which is 1,200 miles away, but I did witness some student protests there, and that’s kind of a conflict.”

7. “You know what they say: ‘Fool me once, shame on you. Fool the American people, make $16 million a year’.”

6. “In my book Killing Kennedy, I claimed to be in Florida, just outside the door of Russian George de Mohrenschildt, a CIA asset who played some role in the JFK assassination, at the exact moment he was committing suicide by shotgun, when in fact at the time I was in Texas, some 1,300 miles away – but that’s about the same as the distance between Buenos Aires and the Falklands.”

5. “When I said, ‘I saw nuns get shot in the back of the head,’ maybe I should have said, ‘I saw pictures of nuns getting shot in the back of the head,’ but where’s the drama in that?”

4. “You spend years listening to conservative pundits, and then tell me you know the difference between truth and fiction.”

3. “When I said, ‘I’ve seen Irish terrorists kill and maim their fellow citizens in Belfast with bombs,’ again it was only pictures, but they were in full color.”

2. “I did nothing wrong, just ask my good friend, George Washington.”

1. “Fox News is such a blizzard of lies, I just figured a few dandruff flakes of exaggeration would get lost in the storm.”

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

Bob Sullivan's top ten everythingtrusted media & news

Top ten reasons Charlie Manson’s wedding was called off

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10. Bride-to-be Afton Elaine “Star” Burton refused to get a matching swastika tattoo on her forehead

9. All the voices in Charlie’s head kept screaming at him to call it off

8. The chapel organist didn’t know how to play “Helter Skelter”

7. Manson finally realized, “This bitch must be insane!

6. Nobody was offering Star the opportunity to be in her own ‘non-reality show’

5. Corcoran State Prison officials wouldn’t let Manson invite his family

4. Star decided to postpone the wedding until after the apocalyptic race war leading to Manson’s being chosen Emperor of the World

3. Charlie ate the best man

2. Star realized she was confused – what she really meant to do was marry John Wayne Gacy

1. She finally looked Manson up on Wikipedia

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

The Emperor decreestrusted media & news

The Emperor decrees a ban on “click-bait” headlines that are not 100% true

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I have been declared Emperor of the World. Let us not waste time explaining why or how; let’s all simply accept the fact that we are better off, as a result; hence, my next decree:

Emperor’s Decree 55C: Henceforth, there shall be no more click-bait headlines, unless the content of the connected article proves the headline to be indisputably true. For instance: “This pit bull tried to eat this kitten; what happens next will blow your mind…” If readers do not actually experience aneurisms as a result of reading, the headline is false and punishment will ensue. Consider, as well, “This article will change your life…” Well, it had better, is all I can say.  And if a headline claims that “This is the best post game speech, ever,” it bloody well had better be. Or else.  Because if it turns into some prancing, weak-bearded, self-centered, mediocre little high school spud spouting every coaching cliché he’s ever heard as he trumpets about “attitude” (albeit  with jauntiness and pluck), there will be Hades to pay. All we are asking is that the authors deliver on their promises. This is all within authorial control; therefore, the Emperor will feel no guilt in doling out punishment.

The Punishment: Violators will be thrown into a special dungeon. The sign on the entrance door reads “Most comfortable dungeon ever where you will never, ever be eviscerated, emasculated or masticated!” What happens next will blow up your mind.

Now. go forth and obey.

The Emperor will grace the world with a new decree each Tuesday morning.

religion & philosophytrusted media & news

Did you know …

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That today was “Four Chaplains Day” in the United States?

No? Well, you’re not alone. The 71st anniversary of that fateful night when four U.S. Army chaplains gave their lives that others might live, caused barely a ripple today. It has come and gone quietly, and largely unmarked … including by yours truly.
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religion & philosophytrusted media & news

Men of faith, men of steel

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Earlier this week, in the course of an evening prayer gathering with @dreampcusa on Twitter, one of our partners offered up a prayer for the priests in Kiev. We joined in with that request, of course … but part of me was wondering, “what’s that about?” Once our gathering closed, I went and Googled “priests Kiev,” then clicked on the ‘News’ option for search results … and I found out exactly what he was talking about, and praying for.
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trusted media & news

Did’ja hear the latest about Carnival? … probably not

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A little over a week ago, I was sitting at the bar on Deck 5 of the Carnival Valor, listening to a story about what had caused that ship to be late in its arrival at St. Maarten a couple of days earlier. It was an interesting piece of information, and I thought it would certainly prove newsworthy … unfortunately my nose-for-news is no match for the prominent proboscises one finds in America’s major news organizations. [Read more →]

religion & philosophytrusted media & news

Two takes on TIME’s “Person of the Year”

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When I think of the time and space that might have been devoted over the last couple days upon people like U.S. Senator Ted Cruz or pop star Miley Cyrus, I find myself encouraged – not just in our world, but in the media that brings that world into our homes 24/7 – by the fact that we are, instead, focused upon Jorge Mario Bergoglio … a man who, as Pope Francis, “took the name of a humble saint and then called for a church of healing. The first non-European pope in 1,200 years, he is poised to transform a place that measures change by the century.”
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travel & foreign landstrusted media & news

A very expensive fungus

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The other day I read that some Russian oligarch or other had paid $95,000 to a restaurateur in New York for a bit of fungus. Well, a fool and his money, as they say.

Alright, it wasn’t just any old bit of fungus. Apparently it was a “white alba truffle” – a special fungus that is quite difficult to find. And you can eat it. Meanwhile, this bit of fungus weighed about 4lb so it was quite heavy, for a fungus. According to Nello Balan, the man who says he sold the oligarch the fungus, it was the biggest such bit of fungus in the history of fungi, or something.

So there you go: Clearly this bit of fungus was [Read more →]

Bob Sullivan's top ten everythingtrusted media & news

Top ten excuses of the London man who was found having sex with his toaster

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10. “That toaster was way hot!

9. “The instructions only cautioned against sticking in knives and forks.”

8. “I heard it gave really good bread!”

7. “The toaster was asking for it. She looked like a real slot!

6. “I was wearing a condom, so I wasn’t worried about getting KitchenAids.”

5. “I thought it would be safer than using the microwave.”

4. “When I got home from the bar, I was really toasted!

3. “I was just trying to brown my Panini.”

2. “I heard somewhere that ‘They plump when you cook ’em’.”

1. “I was trying to make my juicer jealous.”

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

travel & foreign landstrusted media & news

Why do Russians hate Texas so much?

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Feodor Dostoevsky- there’s a town named after him in Texas- allegedly.

Recently I read that the population of people speaking Russian at home in the United States has quadrupled over the last thee decades. According to the US Census office, Russians – or rather Russian speakers – are now almost 1 million strong. That’s a lot of post-Soviet immigrants. And yet it seems there is at least one area in America that Russian speakers would rather avoid: my adopted state of Texas. [Read more →]

travel & foreign landstrusted media & news

When kings go incognito

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One of my favorite story motifs is of the king who travels incognito to learn what is really happening in his land. This idea shows up not only in folktales and fictions, but also in reality: Caliph Harun al-Rashid did it in 8th-century Iraq, while Turkmenbashi, the deceased leader of Turkmenistan, did it in his days as Soviet boss of that desert land. King Abdullah of Jordan also disguised himself and walked among his people shortly after he came to the throne.

But it’s not only Eastern potentates who like to walk among mortals on occasion. This week we can add to the list of incognito leaders a man I had never heard of until [Read more →]
books & writingtrusted media & news

Why Guantanamo Bay inmates are totally hot for ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’

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When not reading about boy wizards and bondage, some berserk jihadis like to relax by thinking about how they can improve on the work of James Dyson. Pic: Wikipedia.

Yesterday I learned an interesting fact: When it comes to books, the bearded inmates of Guantanamo Bay are totally hot for “Fifty Shades of Grey,” the first novel of a popular trilogy about the erotic adventures of a young female graduate named Anastasia Steele and an international businessman named Christian Grey. No, really – a US congressman said it, so it must be true.

Indeed, Representative Jim Moran of Virginia told The Huffington Post: “Rather than the Quran, the book that is requested most by the [detainees] is ‘Fifty Shades of Grey.’ They’ve read the entire series.” [Read more →]
trusted media & news

In Praise of Firefighters

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It’s been more than thirty years since I took the field as a substitute forest firefighter … but that brief service left me with a deep appreciation for the profession, and for those who embrace it. There remains to this day a place in my heart and my prayers for firefighters, which hasn’t diminished one bit over the decades … in fact, it grew some on ‘9/11’ … and it grew once again with this week’s tragic news from Arizona. [Read more →]

books & writingtravel & foreign lands

Kim Jong-un declares admiration for Hitler: what could possibly go wrong?

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The bookstore is that way.”

The North Korean dissident website New Focus International carried an interesting story on Monday. According to insiders, Kim Jong-un is getting into Hitler. In fact, the tubby tyrant digs the Nazi dictator so much that he’s started gifting copies of “Mein Kampf” to his inner circle. Having emulated Stalin for decades, it’s time for the regime to embrace a new villain.

At first glance, this is perplexing. What is there in “Mein Kampf” that has any relevance for the people of the “Hermit Kingdom”? Undoubtedly, Der Führer would have viewed the decidedly non-Aryan Kim as [Read more →]
art & entertainmenttravel & foreign lands

The curious Russian afterlife of Steven Seagal

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Judo expert and morbidly obese Hollywood Z-lister open martial arts center in Moscow

Long, long ago – for about 15 minutes – Steven Seagal was a big deal in Hollywood. His movie “Under Siege” made a lot of money. But that was pretty much it. Next came a string of big-budget flops followed by a lengthy and ongoing twilight spent in straight-to-video purgatory.

As for me, I don’t think I’ve ever made it all the way through a Seagal film. His stiff, tubby frame, extreme humorlessness and mystic posturing make it impossible for me to suspend disbelief. Here in the US he serves as a punch line, part of the flotsam and jetsam of trash culture. Steven Seagal – that’s the washed up ‘90s action movie guy who peddles an aftershave lotion named [Read more →]
politics & governmenttrusted media & news

What I want to know about George W. Bush’s presidential library in Dallas

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Howdy y’all- the robot LBJ keeps us yukkin’, pic from here

There are 13 “presidential libraries” in the US. These are grandiose shrines that contain the papers and records of every president since Herbert Hoover. Tomorrow the library dedicated to George W. Bush will open in Dallas and all living presidents will be there to celebrate – rather like one of those episodes of Doctor Who where the current incarnation meets with his past selves to foil a Dalek invasion.

I have visited three of these libraries. The first was Nixon’s, which I explored while staying with a friend in California 10 years ago. At the time, Nixon was still sufficiently notorious that his library was the only one to receive no support from the federal government. Instead it was run by [Read more →]
ends & oddreligion & philosophy

The other Koresh

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Don’t worry, there are no dinosaurs.

This Friday, April 19, will mark the 20th anniversary of the fire that brought an end to the Waco siege, after a 50-day-long standoff between David Koresh, his followers and the FBI. Seventy-six people died in the inferno, and the name “Koresh” is forever infamous as a result. What most people don’t know is that a century earlier, there was another Koresh – also American and just as messianic, if less randy. [Read more →]

race & culturetrusted media & news

Are white supremacists on the rampage in Texas?

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Photos of the Klu Klux Klan in the 1920s


I had been in the US for five years before I encountered my first white supremacist. It happened outside a gas station on a rural back road in Texas, next to a used tire lot that I suspected was a front for skullduggery. We didn’t exchange any words; we just walked past each other, scowling. How did I know he was a white supremacist if we didn’t talk? The “White Power” tattoo on his gut was a dead giveaway.

Subtle, I thought. Still, I wondered if I should give him the benefit of the doubt. [Read more →]
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