10. Your “lace curtains” seem to be catching an unusually large number of flies
9. After a mudslide swept through your house, it actually looked better
8. Your “bean bag chair” is made of accumulated lint
7. Even Jehovah’s Witnesses won’t come inside
6. Your “dust bunnies” have all been devoured by “dust bobcats”
5. You’ve lost three pets and a nephew to indoor avalanches
4. Something keeps slamming your refrigerator door shut…from the inside!
3. When somebody asks, “What died in here?” you give them a list
2. You wipe your feet on the mat before stepping outside
1. Now that Trump is gutting the EPA, you’re hoping they’ll finally stop sending you warning letters
Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.