10. I’m out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
9. I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute.
8. I may be a schizophrenic, but at least I have each other.
7. “I’m having trouble finding myself,” Waldo said to his psychiatrist.
6. My uncle found a new cure for Tourette’s. He swears by it.
5. I was just hugged and then mauled by a bipolar bear.
4. The hardest part about going to Hypochondriacs Anonymous is admitting you don’t have a problem.
3. I’m not crazy, I’m a lover. That’s why I’m in a jacket that lets me hug myself.
2. Insanity means never having to say, “I’m guilty.”
1. I try not to limit my madness to March.
Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.
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