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Top ten signs you ate too much on Thanksgiving

10. You just woke up from your tryptophan coma

9. While slicing the pumpkin pie, you cut your finger and gravy came out

8. You had so many helpings of mashed potatoes, you set off another famine in Ireland

7. Everyone in Jersey keeps calling you “Governor”

6. All your pets are missing

5. Both Ben and Jerry have friended you on Facebook

4. The Republicans are trying to shut down your mouth

3. You needed the Jaws of Life to get out of your Barcalounger

2. In the movie Gravity, you are clearly visible sitting in your backyard

1. You tried twerking, and set off an earthquake in Guatemala
 

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus [4] (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 [5] and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.

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