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Funniest headline in the news this week

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I think it might be this one, from The Daily Beast, a website run by a formerly successful magazine editor of some renown:

Obama Trumps Libya Critics

A bit early for drawing that conclusion, wouldn’t you say? Apparently not.  After a few paragraphs of preamble, reminding us of the criticisms of the president (such as his failure to seek approval for this war from Congress, well who cares about that?) we arrive at this stunning piece of analysis:

Now that Libya seems to have turned out all right, with the rebels controlling most of Tripoli and Gaddafi barely clinging to power, the critics look overly cautious, if not plain wrong. But none of them are saying that they are sorry.

It’s at moments like this that you really wonder about the kind of people running the media. This after all is a site affiliated with Newsweek, allegedly a serious magazine. I mean 2003 wasn’t that long ago. Doesn’t this individual and fellow cheerleaders so desperate to find something positive to say about Obama’s generally feeble leadership remember all that stuff about “mission accomplished” in Iraq, which was followed by years of bloodshed, carnage and political hysteria?  Apparently not.

No, it’s turned out ‘all right’ even though we don’t really know who the ‘rebels’ are, or whether or not the country will descend into internecine clan warfare, or whether Islamist radicals will seize power. Remember: these krazy kats murdered one of their own commanders a few weeks back.

And yet it goes on, criticizing skeptics with lines like:

And those who thought Libya is a disaster still believe it is, regardless of the street parties in Tripoli.

Well, they’re having parties, so that’s OK. It’s like the Ewoks dancing at the end of Return of the Jedi, isn’t it? Any minute now we’ll see the ghost of Anakin Skywalker and Obi Wan waving at us. They had parties when the Shah of Iran was toppled and within two years the Ayatollah Khomeini had killed more people than Reza Pahlavi did in a reign of many decades. They probably had a party in George W. Bush’s house when he won re-election in 2004 but I’m sure that didn’t smooth the furrowed brows of his opponents.

Then we get this gem:

“Libya is a narrative that works for people who are passionate about democracy and liberty,” says the American Enterprise Institute’s Danielle Pletka. “

Er, you are aware that Libya is a tribal state where many individuals have little regard for the concept of a “nation”, that early on the rebels were attacking lots of black people, that one of the prominent rebel leaders used to recruit jihadis to kill Americans in Iraq, and that NATO had to tell the rebels to stop targeting civilians or they’d bomb them too?

Jeez. Total ignorance of cultural realities + willful amnesia +  juvenile point scoring against political foes fueled by a desperate desire to shore up faith in a tragically inept president= one truly dreadful article. And it’s not the only one, not even within the site. I struggle to understand people like this and their fear of truths so obvious it’s embarrassing and tedious even to state them.  The world is what it is: why pretend otherwise?

Oh wait, my mistake- the rebels are having parties, aren’t they? Everything’s OK little baby, go to sleep, go to sleep…

Daniel Kalder is an author and journalist originally from Scotland, who currently resides in Texas after a ten year stint in the former USSR. Visit him online at
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9 Responses to “Funniest headline in the news this week”

  1. When I saw the title of this post, I thought you were going to talk about the story with the headline “Bull Semen Forces Closure Of Interstate Ramp.”

    That’s a pretty funny headline, but you’re right, the “Obama Trumps Libya Critics” is a lot funnier. It’s so funny, actually, that I can feel the pain in my duodenum flaring up again.

    It’s important that Obama be successful in Libya so that he can remain powerful enough politically to ensure nobody touches our medicaid!

  2. Yes, it’s not exactly funny ha-ha, more funny in a painful, jeez what’s that stabbing pain kind of way.

  3. Oh look- here’s another one:

  4. Funny how Obama is all for citizens of other countries picking up arms and demanding their freedom…. all the while he and his minions work to destroy the 2nd Amendmant. The news will show hundreds of Libyans shooting AK’s in the air and celebrating but bombard us Americans with how bad guns are and all the destruction they cause. Maybe he can send Eric Holder over there to collect all those nasty weapons up now that he won the war.

  5. I forgot to add… and sell them to Mexican drug cartels.

  6. David Remnick gets in on the act:

    And coins the unintentional zinger: Obama’s “anti doctrinal doctrine.”


  7. We can all breathe a sigh of relief now that columnists at the New Yorker and the Washington Post have declared the Libyan rebels victorious. Who knew those two publications were so high on military intervention in Middle Eastern countries?

  8. They’re lovin’ it.

  9. I think they’re for it when people they don’t like are against it, and vice versa.

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