10. “It’s so hot, I just killed a guy for asking, ‘Hot enough for ya?’.”

9. “It’s so hot, Mel Gibson actually appreciates the cold shoulder his ex-girlfriend is giving him.”

8. “It’s so hot, the cows are giving evaporated milk.”

7. “It’s so hot, my car’s GPS lady keeps directing me towards Canada.”

6. “It’s so hot, Amy Winehouse tested positive for Slurpees.”

5. “It’s so hot, the fish are sweating.”

4. “It’s so hot, I saw a squirrel handling his nuts with tongs.”

3. “It’s so hot, President Obama’s motorcade was spotted outside a Dairy Queen.”

2. “It’s so hot, Dick Cheney was caught waterboarding himself.”

1. “It’s so hot, Lindsay Lohan said she was actually looking forward to spending some time in the ‘cooler’.”

Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything appears every Monday.

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Bob Sullivan

Bob Sullivan is the author of the 1979 cult classic Clonus (also known as Parts: The Clonus Horror), starring Peter Graves, Keenan Wynn and Dick Sargent, which was lovingly sent up on Mystery Science Theater 3000 and was the basis for the 2005 DreamWorks' Michael Bay film The Island, starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Bob Sullivan’s Top Ten Everything is published on Mondays.

Latest posts by Bob Sullivan (Posts)

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