10. Solid gold toilets, to replace their gold-plated ones.

9. More homes than John McCain can count.

8. A tree that really does grow money.

7. Diamonds on the soles of their shoes

6. Costa Rica

5. A real 100 Grand Candy Bar

4. A “World’s Wealthiest Man” coffee mug

3. Special glasses that block out the sight of “poor” people (6 figures or less annual income)

2. Their dignity (though they won’t have nearly enough cash).

1. More Congressman, to vote for their next round of bailouts.

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