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What women want: ask Burger King

According to Burger King’s team of experts, the way to a woman’s heart may not be through her stomach (I suppose they’ve tried that and failed?) but through her nose. Hence, a new cologne for men — Flame by BK — with a flame-broiled scent.

Of course, it only costs $3.99, so, perhaps, if marketed to an appropriate, not too picky, audience… Still, wouldn’t it be more chivalrous to buy the object of your affection a Big Whopper than tantalize her with the smell of it?

Also, how long before the FDA will demand warning labels: “Do not visit wildlife reserves while wearing this cologne”?

(Tip o’ the hat to David Brensilver.)

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6 Responses to “What women want: ask Burger King”

  1. At least most men don’t mind being treated like a piece of meat.

  2. Yes, this cologne must be for losers who wish they *could* get treated like a piece of meat – and preferably not by a hungry tiger

  3. It’s amazing the things people will pay money for!

  4. Yes, but my guess is that for most men, smelling like a “whopper” is false advertising.

  5. Ok, hold on.

    I’ve smelled some of the stuff guys insist on wearing. Women, too.

    I don’t think I need to convince anyone that the smell of a flame-broiled burger is way better than some of the noxious crap that makes your eyes water in an elevator.

    Plus, I think I read somewhere that the smell of burgers makes girls horny.

  6. I would be interested in finding out if anyone wearing it will actually attract more action than they did before. (I think the creators of this cologne probably also read somewhere that it makes girls horny.) My original point stands: you want to make a girl horny, *buy* her a burger. It’s far more gentlemanly than just tempting her with a smell and no substance (plus, see Mark’s very apt comment above).

    I’m sure it’s covered in Dr. Verne’s Northern White Trash Etiquette (http://www.amazon.com/dp/1583485422/?tag=wfthecoliseum-20)

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